Emerson

I think ofour covered the grammar that you neglected :-) The story is an amazing work in the making honestly . You have the ability, just not the...I'm not sure ...

He had already looked at all of them twice before, and Kyle could still feel Jonathon's glare from two hours ago. the way kyle and jon are mentioned in this ...

This isn't so bad! Give yourself a break. There are some general script writing things I want to fix, and some writing things I want to fix. I'll use this ...

Well I either finally gave in whether from boredom or the offer of tummy shots. But how ever, here I am. I'm interested, and it's good. I liked how Ch ...

I enjoyed it :-) I had to read it, the title caught me, it being one of my favorite books. A good way to capture the readers feelings for Hum, ...

Look its the established person here to give you notice! *dances* :-P Actually, what Aiden meant to say was that was the third night that week that Mike had called ...

he cold on my tongue, clanking it round, gives me a sense of false pleasure. 'gives' is in the wrong tense unless you split it up and said "It gives ...

I just finished it an hour ago. For a YA about vampires, I suppose it does duty. My inner Anne Rice fan didn't hate it too much, though my lonely ...

This will sound lax of me, won't it? All too long for me to actually read. True, lengthy poetry exists, but I'm not keen on it. So what I'm really ...

Let e be around you're missing something there. Hmmm...I suppose first I'll pick at the things that annoy me, then say what I liked? You used nearly no punctuation besides ...

I'm not sure how I should start this? You have several obvious spelling errors, all of which could have been caught by a spell check—and if your word processor doesn't ...

“Really? I remember you beating the crap out of me,” Kyle said. Thank you for answering the who, and then, the why :-) “This may come as news to you, ...

I'm here! *falls into Sam's arms* Er... to critique! Yes... XP he’d say, magically pulling a sabre from its invisible sheath at its side. Should that be "his"? At a ...

Jon watched Kyle walk into the bathroom and pull the door to. what's with you and not finishing your sentences lately? "I just feel like one of those pathetic character ...

Jonathon dropped his hands to his side and stood under the bright fluorescent lights. [s]The[/s] very interesting "the" "See? None of that. No jokes. If I bare my soul to ...