BellaRoma

I'm afraid I found this difficult to read. It's all one block, this would be easier on the eye if broken into paragraphs. I seriously tried to read it once ...

I enjoyed this because of the suspense and mystery. I like your main character's tone and she seems well thought out for a first chapter. There was lots of description ...

Nice imagery. I love the idea of the apple and the taste of it. I could really imagine myself in the speaker's situation and the taste of the apple changing. ...

I don‘t mind this poem but it is dragged down by missing commas all over the place. Re-read and you‘ll probably see. I‘m probably being harsh becase I don‘t often ...

Pretty cool. I agree with Rarouni - this poem seems to be about insanity. Had the non-capital I's not been pointed out I wouldn't have really noticed them. Now I ...

I have been following this story closely and I like the way it's going. I love the bitter, sarcastic tone of AJ that makes her all the more convincing. It's ...

Awesome. Creepy dark forest, classic setting for a mystery/ fantasy (are there monsters?). I love it! Definitely don't discard the idea but what you need now is a main character ...

Hey. Finally got round to reviewing your work. Glad to see this next part of your story. I didn't realise it was a prologue and just loved it as a ...

Whoah! What a moving re-telling of the first marathon. I have heard the story but your version was extremely emotive. I loved the bit about the bloody footprints and his ...

A pretty good fanfiction, I have read the hunger games and I like your spin on the story. Obviously the bloodbath is quite an intense moment so a lot needs ...

I like this because it draws readers in like a good prologue should. You kind of tell me what's going to happen but I still want to read on anyway, ...

I'm curious. The plot appears to be deepening, particularly at the end of the chapter. Poppy has already attacked Arabella and I now wonder how far she'll go. It seems ...

Cool! Your main character was great and described in minute detail (in terms of attitude especially) I think this really brings him to life and readers can easily sort of ...

Ooh! I loved the setting of the fancy hotel and the supposed romantic dinner. Your main character seems well put across and I quite enjoyed reading from her point of ...

A good first chapter that set the scene for the story wonderfully. I haven't got to the other chapters yet but I'll be sure to. There was definitely something sinister ...