Bella

Hmm...this looks ineteresting. I hope there's more soon! A few quick points: "He got up and slid his feet in the same old pair he got for his 15th birthday" ...

Well...I think this was too simple. It seemed repeatative, and forced. There wasn't any real poetic quality, apart from the way you separated the words and thoughts. There wasn't any ...

What else is there? There’s no point in living life Like you're dead unless you're Here to make me take my first Real breathe of air. First, that should be ...

Well, Suzanne dear, that was certainly interesting. Honestly, as disturbing as it may have been, I liked it. My only suggestion is to, perhaps, fiddle with it a bit -- ...

My life poem Who am I? Who are you? I'm a nobody in a somebody town Who are you? Who am I? A small speck in a billion dots Are ...

The clock strikes midnight, and he doesn’t seem to care or notice. Unless it prompted him to do what he did next . He grabbed me into my arms and ...

Awww! I thought that was absolutely adorable. I really enjoyed the way you went into both characters heads, and showed all their thoughts. Within that short about of time, I ...

Well, I really like this. Unlike Seraph, I liked the way it showed into some of the other peoples minds -- I didn't think it was irrelovant. The only thing ...

[quote="wildnaturespirit"] Scorching fire Burning flames The phoenix screeches A trill of pain Silence, Ashes rain Children cry, Mothers weep, Families splintered Dreams turned to shadow Hate, Tears r

It seems a lot like a verse out of a song or something. I loved the beginning, but I think it got a little....um....*searching for lacked flow at the end. ...

I like it, but there's also something I don't like about it. Perhaps it's the scene you chose to describe, or the way you described it. The one part that ...

Personally, I really REALLY liked this poem. Just a few little things... as Twinflower said, you need to put in some appostraphes and commas in. That might make the flow ...

First the simple stuff~ her lonley heart sinking should be "lonely" As do her soul. should be "does" She contiues to push back her thoughts should be "continues" This may ...

kind of confuses me to some extent. It sounds kind of like a love poem, but at the same time a heart break poem. Perhaps it is a love poem ...

Hmm...I think the idea was good, but it could be worked with a bit more. I don't know that I cared much for the rhythm of your poem, the way ...