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Re: ~Tomorrow~
First of all I liked what this piece was about, it was very deep and meaningful. I wish I could write things like that in the morning!! However, it didn't ...
Apr 7, 2007 -
Re: stuck in today
Yeah........this should probably be in Lyric Poetry........ Anyways.....this was very intriguing and meaningful. But with that my choice is not to forget I didn't really understand that line...... Goo
Apr 7, 2007 -
Re: Simile
This was good. I really liked the contrast used between the old and the new.....very poetic. The first verse could have been broken up into more, smaller verses so that ...
Apr 6, 2007 -
Re: Running from yourself ((Whole))
I didn't really find it confusing, and I'm proud of the fact that I knew that even the Doctor was part of the girls personality. The only thing is that ...
Apr 5, 2007 -
Re: No More (Some Changes) 2nd copy
This is a very emotional and well driven piece. There are a few grammatical errors (gunna), (Question mark instead of exclamation mark.) and other spelling mistakes but these are unimportant. ...
Apr 3, 2007 -
Re: Will I End
A very emotional piece. Well written and very meaningful. This was the only line I was slightly unsure about... your smell burns me to the soul It just doesn't sound ...
Apr 2, 2007 -
Re: This Crazy Game
I did enjoy this poem, it flowed easily. 'endless stress' is spot on... :P HeHe. I am a fan of last line repetition and you used it well. Why can ...
Mar 31, 2007 -
Re: 'The Strangest Dream' or 'The Ride of Nancy Nimbleheimer'
Hehe!! :lol: That is a mixture of weird, funny and sad. But it is all written really well. I doubt i can crit much on the story ( as it ...
Mar 23, 2007 -
Re: Ice cubes
YAY!! You put in some dialouge, which makes it move faster than 'the canned beans'. Don't mean to sound annoying but I actually preferred Canned Beans to this, as I ...
Mar 22, 2007 -
Re: Nameless Poem
I really like the imagery that this piece provokes. I also like the repetition and use of a question. However I also do not understand where it was going, maybe ...
Mar 22, 2007 -
Re: The Teabag Rocket
I liked the worked well to create suspense and a little 'ahh' couldn't help but escape me when i finished reading it. However i agree with Snoink, it could have ...
Mar 12, 2007 -
Re: Arya's light or Elvish light
I like your use of metaphors, it makes the piece very gripping and effective. To Improve- Maybe try re-arranging the piece to make it flow better as the part about ...
Mar 3, 2007 -
Re: Bloodlust
I liked it a lot and felt you used the right mixture of dialogue and discription (including some good similies). Was felix born a vampire? Sorry I'm not really familiar ...
Feb 28, 2007
