Cool poem. Liked the end part where you asked the reader what they thought.
Definetly needs a new title. How about something to to with describing or life?
love your signature about veggies (lol)
Can't wait to hear your next poem.
Charlotte
Frost on a windowpane
Delicate as a rose,
Cold as a tumbling waterfall
Fragile as our impermanent lives.
Fireworks on New Years Eve
Bright as the eye of a child
Loud as the music of the heart
Beautiful as another year.
Stories told by the old
Exciting as a new day
wise as the kings of yesteryear
Captivating as a summer storm.
This life is a metaphor,
And a simile within a metaphor.
Is this poem about life,
Or love, or fireworks, or stories?
Listen to the colors
Hear the aromas
Smell the salt in the storm.
Cool poem. Liked the end part where you asked the reader what they thought.
Definetly needs a new title. How about something to to with describing or life?
love your signature about veggies (lol)
Can't wait to hear your next poem.
Charlotte
This was good.
I really liked the contrast used between the old and the new.....very poetic.
The first verse could have been broken up into more, smaller verses so that it was easier to read and flowed better.
The last line seemed slightly out of place..........could it be replaced with something that fitted better?
Good work,
Alainna
xxxxxxxxxx
120,220 Literary Works • 649,152 Reviews
Points: 840
Reviews: 168
Donate