He Had One of Those Noses

Hey there!

I think you did a wonderful job on this. You write with such an ease that it makes it a joy to read. None of it comes across as forced which makes all of it - the desciptions, dialogue - even more realistic.

I've noticed from reading your work that your writing excels when you write a scene packed with emotion. This is awesome, because it means the writer goes through all of the emotions with your character, rather than just reading about what your character is going through and not really caring that much.

I think the ending was great - even though it was so sad. I think the little twist was great - I honestly thought it had been her that had been hit and, when you described her getting up out of the chair, I thought it was her soul leaving her body. That could just be me and my overactive imagination and reading too much into things, but it made the real ending - when we find out it's Cole in the hospital bed - even more heart-renching.

I do agree that the ending is a little abrupt. You do such a great job of decribing her emotions after the break-up, but at the end, it just seems a little flat in comparision. You don't have to have her completely freak out, but a little more of her thoughts/feelings, would help to push the reader even further to tears.

I hope this helps!

xDudettex

This is so sad...But I'm confused. Did they hit each other? why was he on his way to the airport? Did I miss something? This has a lot of potential, just add a little explanation here and there. I like some vagueness, but this is just a little unclear. I do like the title and the opening paragraph. Cute and tugs at the helpless romantic part of my heart (which is a huge part by the way)

I wasn't a huge fan of where it was going until the end, the twist really won me over. It was well written though, don't get me wrong, I enjoyed reading it, just the type of story not really my taste.

I don't like romances (they're riddled with melodrama and cliche) and I have no clue what compelled me to read this. But actually, I wasn't too disappointed. This was well-written, which is something that this genre typically lacks because it's usually written by angst-ridden teenagers. I felt like there was some honesty in your characters and their reactions, and to tear apart the "ugh" moments would honestly probably take away what romance writing pretty much is, and that's a bunch of "ugh" moments. Dang, I know I'm stepping on some toes with this review. Okay, so the pros: this was well-written, sweet, and it's kind of cool to see a guy go out and write a romance. I'm a girl and usually can't stand to write them because mine are so low-quality, so good job.
Keep writing,
StoryWeaver

Gyaaah! Why am I crying! This was so amazing! Yes, It was cliche, yes it was predictable, and yes it was....fantastic. You did an amazing job. Just one question: If she was so unsure one minute, for so long, knowing he was going to ask, what happened when she was suddenly so blubbery and bawly, sure she loved him? Just in my opinion, she might have taken longer to realize she did love him after all.

Other than that, it was just amazing. Great, wonderful, sweet, fantastic, tsao-sauce work.

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