I was born the fairest of them all,
rose lips, ebony hair, skin like December snow.
My mother's last words: "She is perfect".
Father wed a woman who was pale and fair,
but Time wrinkled her petals
as mine blossomed.
"Oh Mirror on the wall, say that I am fairest!"
But mirrors cannot lie, so she punished me daily.
With all those bruises, I could never outshine her.
At last I ran, far away where she can't see me,
found refuge with seven dwarves,
but sadly mirrors haven't learned to lie.
The apple looked most fresh, so I bit
and now I lie in this glass coffin, breath shallow,
hoping the prince will find me soon.
The coffin opens, my heart struggles to lay dormant
as a kiss brings rosy red back to my lips.
In my rescuer's arms, I am safe for a moment.
"Cut cut cut!" The director yells. "That was terrible!
Jesus, Paul, at least pretend you like her!"
My sweet prince drops me, for the lying lens is off.
I go home to the dwarves, fighting over niche roles,
pour a drink for Mother Dearest, may she never find me.
"Oh Mirror Mirror, say there's a prince for me."
A/N: This was my entry for the YWS Olympics "Fairy Tale Poetry". Not a winner, but I really liked it. Enjoy! :)
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139,346 Literary Works • 672,539 Reviews
Hi, happy review day! First of all I'd like to say that I really liked this poem! It was beautiful at the beginning and the twist at the end was great. The ending was a bit confusing though. The last paragraph in particular. I'm not really sure what was going on there, or what exactly happened. All in all I did really enjoy it though.
Nice work!
-Ruby-
Hey! ajruby here to review.
Wow.. This was such a marvelous thing to break up the routine of reading, reviewing, reading, reviewing... I really love this poem! And I nearly died at the 2nd to last stanza.
Anyway, some techincal stuff.
1. "But mirrors cannot lie, so she punished me daily." That's a bit unclear as to who that's speaking of.
2. "found refuge with seven dwarves," Maybe if you added an "and" at the beginning, it would be a little more clear. (Just a suggestion.)
Over all, I think this is abosolutely wonderful! Keep up the great work!
Happy review day and may the reviews be ever in your favour!
-Lady Ariana
Oh, my God. Sorry. Just. I was reading, and then I got to "Cut!" and I about died laughing. Holy cow.
So that's a hilarious and ironic twist that totally made this poem for me. However, I do think after this that the last stanza is a little bit confusing:
If Snow White (or the actress portraying her) is pouring a drink for Mother Dearest--I mean, is she actually pouring a drink to give to her mother (in which case her mother would be there, so why the line "may she never find me"?), or is she pouring a drink as kind of a wish that her mother won't find her?
The last line is also a bit confusing in this context, but I'm just going to assume that the actress wishes for a real true love, not an actor who drops her the moment the cameras are off.
That's it for me. Awesome job! I really enjoyed this.
Blue
Thanks! Yeah I think "to" is probably the more appropriate word there. Like sort of an ironic toast, if that makes sense. And yeah, that's what I was going for with the last line. Thanks again!
Oh this was really, really good, I like this fairy tale poem a LOT. I like the idea that ''there's a prince for me'', I hope one day I find my prince too.
And I love your poem, please tell me at which place it wins
Thanks for the comment! It actually didn't win, but it did get an honorable mention.
There were a lot of great entries though, so I'm not surprised.