I will never love again.
It was foolish to think that
I could find happiness
once you said goodbye.
Your love is all there is.
How could I believe that
my heart will fly once more?
Love swallows me whole,
but I cannot forget you until
a hand reaches out to hold mine.
In her blue eyes, everything changes.
In her blue eyes, everything changes.
A hand reaches out to hold mine,
but I cannot forget you until
love swallows me whole.
My heart will fly once more.
How could I believe that
your love is all there is?
Once you said goodbye,
I could find happiness.
It was foolish to think that
I will never love again.
A/N: This was an attempt at a palindrome, a poem that can read backward and forward. More info on this style here: https://www.youngwriterssociety.com/viewtopic.php?f=152&t=101063
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125,009 Literary Works • 672,837 Reviews
Beautiful! This palindrome shows an admirable talent. It takes a lot of concentrated, organized thinking, and not anyone could pull it off this well. Great job.
This work talks about how a person feels empty when their love is rejected, and that's something which many people experience, so the words you've written are widely relatable. However, I will interject that even tho a person may feel this way, it doesn't mean that there's nothing left to life. Still, you've shown us the emotions of the narrator, entering their mind to display their pain. Good work. Keep it up!
Thanks for the review! Yeah this poem is definitely melodramatic. I just kind of built the palindrome off the line/idea "I will never love again" moving into the speaker indeed finding love again.
Hey niteowl
Okay, so first of all, this is a really nice poem! I think that your attempt at a palindrome was wonderful! It was smooth and really touching. The way you did it, was like a story. First this heartbroken person feels as if they will never love again and that their special someone is the only one for them. But the story flips, and this person realizes that they were foolish to think that and I feel like their heart is healed in the end. It was really cool to read this!
The only thing I would fix is using more expressive words. Right now it's like an outsiders look of this person's story. But if you use words like heart wrenching or something like that, it would bring the reader into that persons narrative. It depends on what you want, but in my opinion would make the poem even better.
I really enjoyed your story! I hope you keep writing poems like this!
- Stellarjay
Thanks for the review! I thought I replied already, whoops. Anyway, I think it's a tricky balance between using stronger words and maintaining form in a structured poem. This form is difficult because the words have to work both backwards and forwards. I do think my poems where I use my usual free verse style can be more expressive. Thanks again!