z

Young Writers Society


12+ Violence

Connection - 21

by Rook


~1161

Slightly off-put by Markus, Kerra climbed up the stairs. She tried to shake off what he’d said. It sounded like Shandi had really blown Ruth’s treatment of her out of proportion… but yet, Ruth had apparently called her before Shandi had left. Kerra didn’t know what kinds of things her mother might have said. And while she’d seemed calm on the outside when Kerra had told her Shandi was leaving, Kerra did think she’d heard a vase crashing or something. Maybe behind the kind, reserved face that Ruth always showed to Kerra was an emotionally unstable person.

Or maybe Shandi had just been exaggerating everything for drama. It wouldn’t have been the first time she’d done it. Shandi had a flair for the dramatic, which was a two-edged sword. It made her charismatic and fun to be around, but if her anger was directed at you, it made everything twice as bad.



Kerra shook her head, trying to clear it of negative thoughts of Shandi. She was at a celebration for Shandi’s life after all. She’d reached the floor above the one she’d entered into. No Name, Angelface, the Grin, and Blast Boy were gathered around a pool table lined with black velvet. There were only about five balls still on the table, and they were all solid colors. Angelface and the Grin were holding the pool cues. Kerra watched as Angelface lined up a shot and expertly sunk the eight ball. 

“Good game, Grin,” she said, offering her hand. “You got a lot more in this time!”

Grin reluctantly shook her hand, the mobile half of his mouth pulled down into a moody scowl. “I still only got three in.”

“Better’n many,” Angel chirped. “We could make it three out of five, if you want.” The Grin’s scowl deepened.

“Kerra!” Blast Boy yelled, running over to her. “You’re here!” As usual, Blast Boy’s hair stood on end, and their face looked scuffed and dirty, though today it looked as if they’d cleaned up a little more than usual.

Kerra smiled. “I am! And you’re all here too! I’m glad. I don’t know anyone else here.”

“I could introduce you!” Blast Boy said, jumping a little.

“Uh, that’s alright. I met your boss already. Markus. I don’t know if I’m up to meeting anyone else yet.”

“Markus is an odd duck,” the Grin said mysteriously. “He’s got some interesting moods. And meeting him for the first time when he’s… well, a bit trashed, if I’m honest, must be an experience.”

“It was,” Kerra agreed.

“He really cared about her,” No Name said quietly. “I mean, there were rumors–”

“Not something to get into right now. It’s a bit of a private matter, don’t you think?” Angelface snapped.

No Name quickly shut their mouth and looked down at the ground.

She sighed. “Sorry, Nonnie, I didn’t mean it. You know how it is.” 

No Name nodded but continued to stare at the floor.

Kerra looked a little closer at Angelface and saw that the dark circles under her eyes were even more prominent than usual, and the whites of her eyes were tinged red as if she’d been crying for days. “You doing okay?” she asked gently.

Angelface shifted. “It’s been rough on all of us,” she said defensively, “but I was wondering something.”

“Oh?” Kerra asked.

“Do you play pool as well as Shandi did? Since she… left… I’ve had no competition! These idiots are about as skilled as a piece of wet corkboard.”

“Hey!” the Grin protested. “I got three in!”

“And you’ve never played against No Name,” Blast Boy added gleefully.

“Not for lack of trying,” Angelface muttered. “But what do you say, Kerra? How are you at pool?”

“Awful,” Kerra admitted. “I can’t count on one hand the number of times I’ve played. I find it just doesn’t suit me.

“Do you want one of us to coach you?” The Grin asked dubiously. “I don’t think any of us would do a very good job, and I don’t know if Angelface would stoop that low today.”

“You’re right about that,” Angelface said, tossing her limp blonde hair over her shoulder. “Today I play pool for one reason, and one reason only: to thrash all competitors.” She grinned like a maniac.

“That’s alright. I think I’d rather just watch. I think I like No Name’s strategy. If no one sees me play, then my skills remain a mystery, and who knows? Maybe I’m actually amazing. But I don’t want to put that to the test today.”

So Kerra spent the rest of the evening watching Angelface handily beat every comer. Numbers stopped by a few times, to make sure the party was going alright. One time he even agreed to play against Angelface, and she barely beat him. He went back downstairs looking a little smug after that. Angelface looked more satisfied and calm than she had all night, and Kerra guessed that she’d enjoyed the challenge. 

Eventually, the party started petering out a little, and Kerra found her eyes growing heavy. It was starting to become difficult to hold back yawns, and so she said her goodbyes to everyone she knew, thanked Numbers for his invitation and hospitality, and left. 

She took a longer route home than she would have usually taken, and her detour took her near Ruth’s sector. Kerra wondered if she’d wound up in the area because her subconsciousness was still disturbed by Markus’s ravings about her. It had been quite a while since she’d last talked to Ruth, and Kerra figured it would be good to check up on her. She was pretty sure that Ruth rarely left the apartment, and had little to no contact with anyone besides Kerra.

A bit of guilt suddenly stabbed through her. How lonely must Ruth be every day? And Kerra avoided her just because Ruth made her a little uncomfortable. She altered her course to take her to Ruth’s apartment. It was late to have guests over, but not late enough to be asleep yet. She knew her mother tended to get only a few hours of sleep every night anyway, and she would likely appreciate the company.

She finally got to the right door and knocked. Silence. She knocked again. Not a single sound from inside. She knocked harder this time. Could her mother really already be asleep? This early at night? Something felt off to Kerra. The door was locked tight. 

Kerra went up through the pillar’s floors to find the apartment manager’s office. The windows were dark, but when she knocked urgently on the door, a woman with a wrinkled face opened the door and peered out at Kerra through tired, squinting eyes. Kerra told her the situation, and the woman got a key card.

They went back down to Ruth’s apartment. The woman flashed the card at the scanner, the door popped open, and there she was.

Ruth, or what had been Ruth, laid out on the ground in a pool of her own blood, her neck brutally slashed open.


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498 Reviews


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Sun Jan 06, 2019 10:04 pm
Que wrote a review...



Hi fortis! Woah, and just when I thought that party would be uneventfully winding down... bam! I didn't see that coming at all. :)

It sounded like Shandi had really blown Ruth’s treatment of her out of proportion… but yet, Ruth had apparently called her before Shandi had left. ... Maybe behind the kind, reserved face that Ruth always showed to Kerra was an emotionally unstable person.

Phew, it looks like Kerra and I are on the same page about this! Was it real or dramatized? It could easily have been either. And now, knowing the ending of this chapter, will we ever know which it was??

“Kerra!” Blast Boy yelled, running over to her. “You’re here!” As usual, Blast Boy’s hair stood on end, and their face looked scuffed and dirty, though today it looked as if they’d cleaned up a little more than usual.

I think Blast Boy was a little mistrustful of Kerra at first? So it's great to see that he's so friendly with her now. :)

“He really cared about her,” No Name said quietly. “I mean, there were rumors–”

“Not something to get into right now. It’s a bit of a private matter, don’t you think?” Angelface snapped.

Uh, woah, I'd actually really like to hear some more about this! It didn't seem like he really cared for Shandi based on what he said to Kerra, but who knows? It's an interesting development, though, especially given the end of the chapter and his outburst against Ruth's treatment of Shandi. I wonder if he could be responsible...?

A bit of guilt suddenly stabbed through her. How lonely must Ruth be every day? And Kerra avoided her just because Ruth made her a little uncomfortable. She altered her course to take her to Ruth’s apartment.

I love how conscientious Kerra is about this, and about a lot of other things too! She's just got this innate politeness and morality--she notices little things, feels guilty about them, and acts on them. <3

So, okay, this is a crazy chapter. It just goes from chill pool playing to bam! Murder. Right now I'm tossing Markus around in my head, just because he just came into play, had a mini rant about Shandi's mother, then made a quick break for the bathroom and now she's dead. But also... we don't even know if she was killed that night or a few days ago or anything. And why?? I know that Everen's up in space and totally unconnected except for Kerra, but I can't help that the deaths out there must somehow be related to the one down in Abyssia. Either way, it's very mysterious, and I can see that Kerra's going to definitely be caught up right in the middle of it. I just hope she can lean on her friends for support.

Very well done with this chapter! I loved the kinship Kerra had with the other gang members, even after Shandi's death, and I also love the sudden twist at the end. You're certainly keeping me on the edge of my seat! <3

-Q




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Sun Dec 30, 2018 8:27 pm
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Shady wrote a review...



Heyo Forto,

Shady back with another review, as promised! Hopefully I'll be able to find something helpful to say about this chapter, beyond just gushing about how much I like your novel lol. Let's get started...

No Name, Angelface, the Grin, and Blast Boy


You have a really interesting choice of names. Is that like, gang nicknames? Or is that literally their names? It just seems strange to me that some of the characters are named Kerra and Ruth and Markus and others are named like "Blast Boy" and "No Name" so I'm curious as to if there's a reason for the wide variation in the naming scheme?

Ruth, or what had been Ruth, laid out on the ground in a pool of her own blood, her neck brutally slashed open.


What? ... WHAT? That is NOT how I was expecting this chapter to end. Oh my gosh, wow. Like... wow. Well done on a plot surprise. I was expecting her to go to Ruth's house and find a bitter old woman that was probably going to be depressive or angry. Not dead. Wow.

~ ~ ~

Wow, again lol. I am really impressed by that cliffhanger. It's very startling and very intriguing. Now I just feel a compulsion to keep reading because I have to know who did that to Ruth and if she did something to deserve it. Definitely not the sort of ending to a party that you'd expect lol.

I'm going to stop rambling since I've basically got nothing other than "wow!" to say about this chapter haha. Onward to the next chapter!

Keep writing!

~Shady 8)




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Mon Dec 10, 2018 6:05 pm
FireSpyGirl wrote a review...



Hi there!!
Interesting chapter, loved the ending! Each one gets better and better! Now, I am going to jump right into this review. There are a few sentences that could use some work.

First one:
"I find it just doesn’t suit me." This is a little awkward to read.

I would try something like this:

"I've found that it just doesn't suit me."

Next sentence:
"Could her mother really already be asleep?" Again, just a little awkward. Maybe do something like this:
"Could her mother really be asleep already?"

Also, when you are taking about the characters Blast Boy and No Name, You make it sound like each one is multiple people, joined. Like when you are describing Blast boy's looks, you keep saying "Their."
I found that a little confusing.
I hope this helped!





"And what is the use of a book," thought Alice, "without pictures or conversations?"
— Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland