Young Writers Society

7-4

For fucks sake! Salem, get off the table! That damn cat is cute but she thinks that she owns the joint or something and I’m just decoration. I swear it’s like her own personal castle and I just scoop her shit. I sigh and readjust my sleek round glasses. Okay, I decided to start this stupid journal again. It probably won’t go anywhere but I need to get the darkness out somehow. The headaches have been getting worse lately. Somehow I think a pen and paper might help. That and Salem, the queen who doubles as a cat. Even if she’s evilly cute. Okay where are my knitting needles? Did i take my medicine? Wait! I sigh, and go find my pill thingy-ma-bobber…and yep. That explains it, still fucking full. I really need to be more consistent. It’s the fourth of July and instead of spending it with family and friends I’m spending it killing things as a death wizard. The cool fancy name is necromancer. I’ll admit I get lonely but at the same time I’m also comfortable, oddly. The fireworks went off. It’s too damn hot to set things on fire in my opinion. And then, my head started throbbing so I grabbed a pen and started writing. Get it out Hazel, just pick up a pen and write. No rules. I probably sound like crap but i just went for it. I told myself that if you still feel like an absolutely bonkers lady after, then set it on fire. So far though, as much as I hate to admit it, I’m enjoying it. Guess that my brain had more to say than I realized. That’s enough for today though.

-Hazel

7-6

I just feel like sleeping, write more later. Popping a trazodone and sleeping like the sloth I am.

7-9

I did it. Wel…most of the dishes are done. So sue me, I still ate off of clean dishes today. I feel like can wizard now.

-Hazel

7-10

I slept all day again. It didn’t help that I took another trazodone. I’ve been stressed lately and needed to chill out a little. So. Enter sleep. Blissful sleep. I texted Carter, but he’s busy and couldn’t respond for a few days. So of course I flipped out thinking he was angry at me or that I did something wrong, said something wrong. Maybe…I texted too much. Maybe I got too dark and he thought a friend like me wasn’t worth the trouble. But my meds are starting to work, I’m finally me again-but is it like a broken plate? Too broken to fix? I’ll ask him about it. But it’ll probably piss him off. Awwww Salem, thanks for the kitty lovin’s. She senses my fucked up mood. Time for another trazodone and then I’ll start fresh tomorrow.

-Hazel

I’m finally out. Hahaha! Let’s see what fun I can have. So, she finally got some dishes clean. Jokes on her, she didn’t put them away. I throw each and every one in the dish drainer onto the floor and smile as they shatter. Salem came to investigate. Stupid cat, always up my hind end. I got a text. Ooooh, let’s see. Oh it’s that bozo loser Carter. Dang this bitch needs to pick better friends, I swear. I then help her out by texting back because I may be evil, but I still care about Hazel. “Screw off loser, I don’t wanna be friends anymore.” There that should do it. He shouldn’t bother us anymore. Okay time to go back in, she probably will have no idea it was me. I don’t think she knows i’m here. The dishes stunt…man she won’t know what hit her.

7-11

Okay what the actual fuck> Someone, a crack head probably came in and shattered all of my clean dishes. I went to sleep and woke up to this. Got a text from Carter, yay hopefully everything is okay with us. SHHHHHIIIIITTTT! He said “blocking you, you’re too crazy damn.” What happened? What’s going on? I look and see the message that I didn't send. I know I didn't send that. No wonder. I was sleeping though. Someone must have texted him when they broke the dishes. Also, I look down because my foot is hurting a little and I have a little shard of glass in my heel. Well shit, I thought I was careful examining the crackheads mess. I’m so freaked out right now. Time for meds Hazel. Calm down bitch, this is crazy but, you’re okay everything is okay. Take hydroxyzine. Where’s Salem? I haven’t seen her at all. I wonder where that cute fur ball went.

I’m out again, hey y’all sorry I didn’t introduce myself before. Name’s Hailey. At 16 years old, I live in Hazel’s body but we share a mind. Weird I know. I know about her but she doesn’t know about me. So I help her out now and again, but also have my fun. She’s sleeping at the moment…or so she thinks ha! I plan on changing up her style a little bit. I’m thinking red nail polish instead of that pale ugly pink. I wonder what she’ll think of this? I sigh happily as I look at my blood red nails. Now that I’ve helped this little lady out I’m going to have some fun now. I want to play. I want to wreck something. I don’t know why I like it but I do. Hmmmm…where is her knitting project? How pitiful a 30 year old knitting. I’ll help that grandma out. She’s so much cooler than she realizes. And for bonus points I’m going to hide it from her. Hmmm…what about the freezer? I think yes, yes that’ll be perfect.

7-12

So things keep getting weirder and weirder. Like fucked up weird. I’m talking twilight zone weird, and I’m not going to lie, I'm starting to get scared. Firstly, my perfectly pink nails are now the color of a stuck pig and I can’t stand them…when did I do this. All I remember is taking the hydroxyzine and trying to chill out. I remember a headache happening but I thought it was a stress headache because of the whole Carter fiasco. And then the cherry on top of it all was finding my knitting needles and unraveled yarn in the freezer. What is going on? Am I sick? Maybe these are just weird side effects of the meds. I am not sure all I know is if something else happens I’m calling my psych doctor to see if it’s a wonky effect of the drugs. Blacking out and memory loss can’t keep happening. But they’re something only I would know about so I know that it’s me doing it. I just for the life of me can’t figure out when or even how it’s happening. Now for Trazodone and some sleep. I’ll figure it out in the morning.

She’s a smart cookie, finally she’s starting to get a grip on this. Okay for the final push, let’s give me a better style of hair. I can’t stand this prissy pink stripe. How about we add a little green in here and mix it up a little? Yes. Let’s do that. I drive to the store and pick the lime green dye and chuckle as I check out. Oh no, someone is trying to get my attention but I don’t know them. I’ll just act like I didn’t hear. I quickly grab my bag of dye and head for home. I add the two stripes and look at the mirror appreciating my handiwork. I can’t wait till she sees this.

7-13

Okay. Time to call the doctor. Apparently I got a text from Taylor this morning pissed because I blew her off at the store last night. And like last time, I was asleep. What the actual fuck is going on? And the cherry on top of this shit sundae is my hair. It has green in it now. Blugh! I’m so confused.

So I called my doctor about the blackouts. And she wants me to come in for some tests. And maybe even a sleep study. I hate hospitals, and the nasty clean sterile smell but I’m going in tonight. It can’t wait. Let’s see if this gets figured out. Hopefully tomorrow I’ll wake up with some answers.

Ah my girl is finally understanding. This place is awful though. Y’all wouldn’t like it. Cold, white, uncomfortable as I’ll get out. I decide to get up and walk around. I wonder if I packed that stupid knitting stuff, that’s better than staring at walls. I also check my phone. Ahhhh silence I’m finally being left alone. She has the worst taste in people. Clingy dog-like friends. Let a gal breathe. I work the needles and breathe in and out and just work through the night. The sooner I get home the better off we’ll be. Oh. The doctor came in.

“Well hello there. I don’t believe we’ve met. I’m the doctor tonight you can call me Kathy, what’s your name?”

“Can’t you see I’m knitting lady, scram!”

“I will after you tell me your name. I really want to get to know you.”

“Fine. It’s Hailey. What else do you want to know? Also, where the heck is some grub…i’m starving over here. I haven’t eaten since yesterday.”

“Nice to meet you Hailey. I’ll get you some food too. I bet you are hungry. When’s the last time that you came out to play?”

“Last night. I wanted to help Hazel with her hair.”

“Any other things you can remember?”

“No lady, now buzz off I’m almost done with this row.”

Gosh, what’s a girl gotta do to get something to eat. She soon has a nurse bring in a tray, i guess Hazel fell asleep before she got it. I scarf it down like I’m in the wild. This is boring. After I eat, I’ll go back in and sleep. Not even a freaking tv? Torture.

7-14

It all makes sense now. However, now I feel even more crazy than I did before. There is actually another person sharing my brain. Dr. Kathy called it Borderline Personality Disorder. According to her, my alternative personality is named Hailey and she’s 16. No wonder I seem to pick up the style of a stripper. Okay, now that its answered, I feel so much better. The doctor says it’ll be okay.