Hello! Valkyria here with a review! I hope you're having a wonderful day/night.
The villanelle caught my eye right away. I've been too scared to write one myself, but you've inspired me to read more of it! Your repetitions were strong and used in good effect. You followed the form well. There is beautiful prose and imagery throughout the poem. I can visualize each line. I also appreciated the themes of sadness and longing for the past.
My only critique is that some of the commas are awkwardly placed in the lines. Commas are meant to pause for a moment and put in dependent clauses.
For example:
The apple never falls far, from the tree.
for I always yearned, to never submit to the bark's hidden dread.
These commas don't need to be there because it breaks up the sentences awkwardly.
This was a lovely poem. Well done!
Points: 11638
Reviews: 194
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