Group Work

by WillowCutz

Published June 10, 2013

In Poem

"Hey I have an ide-!"
 
"Come on! How are we supposed to..."
 
"Well I have an-"
No?
Okay.
I'll just sit here and try to listen.
 
"We could try...."
 
NO! 
That'd put us back where we started.
 
"No, that would-"
 
"No wait that wouldn't do a thing...."
 
That's what I've been saying.
Would they just listen to me for two seconds!
I have a plan....
 
"....How's  about we's try..."
 
NO! 
You can't make "we" more plural.
Or "how" for that matter.
Who taught you grammar?
 
"Guys, if you'd just listen I have an idea. We could...."
 
"I know! We could...."
 
That's what I said. 
You stole my idea.
At least they were listening.
 
"You know you could have contributed..."
 
Unbelievable!
First they won't listen to me,
Then they steal my idea,
And then they think I wasn't contributing!
 
"Actually, guys I was trying to tell you-"
 
"That's great, now could you stop making excuses and help us?"
 
Really?
 
Comments & reviews · 6
Random avatar
Vicky17
Comment
Vicky17 commented Comment · Jun 19, 2013

haha I must say I love it. Very simple and it doesn't even need any explanation. I love the sarcastic tone. I think everyone can relate to this.
Keep it up, I'd love to hear more of your work.

User avatar
itsLayal
Comment
itsLayal commented Comment · Jun 18, 2013

oh my god!! i cant even describe how true this is!
Happens every single time. I love your style in writing.
it's different and very special.
keep up the awesome work! :D

DannieInkblotHanson wrote a review Review · Jun 16, 2013

Oh goodness. I know exactly how this feels. Exactly. People can be so dumb sometimes. I can practically feel the frustrated rage in that last "really?" This is actually super funny.
One of the biggest means of humor in your poem is that you accurately portray how utterly irritating it is to be ignored when you know exactly what you're doing. Having the actual dialogue is a clever little poetry thing and in my opinion you totally pull it off. Gooooood jooooooooob to you, indeed. I'll say you have captured about 80% of the reason as to why I never talk to people. That part when you said "No? Okay. I'll just sit here..." I have actually thought those exact words.
Well done. I done laugheded.

User avatar
catcha01
Review
catcha01 wrote a review Review · Jun 12, 2013

Hey Willowcutz,

Catcha01 with a review. I really like this poem. It's a perfect representation of the product of bossy and self-centered group leaders. The dialogue you chose was very realistic making it like a real conversation in the classroom, than a theatrical performance. I really did enjoy reading this poem, but it also opened my eyes to something. I'm ususally chosen leader or supervisor and this poem was also a quick reminder to not leave others out. Thanks for that by the way. Anyway. awesome poem.

~Catcha01

Gabriellemarice99 commented Comment · Jun 10, 2013

Ha this made me smile I love it! I can't really relate because in group work I'm that person that everyone else just expects to do everything but it was very different and I know lots of people could relate to it! Great job!

User avatar
nmk1128
Review
nmk1128 wrote a review Review · Jun 10, 2013

I think what you are doing in this piece is an interesting bit. However, it can be confusing to follow - especially transitioning between thoughts. I think slant verse would greatly improve this poem. It would allow you to replicate the human thought process in a lot easier fashion. This poem is very relatable to kids who are in school and have to deal with ignorant group partners. This is one of the reasons I prefer to work alone :p Very innovative piece!



You're given the form, but you have to write the sonnet yourself. What you say is completely up to you.
— Madeleine L'Engle, A Wrinkle in Time