The Poetry Book
Depression is me
Clouds is where my head is
Joy is what I’ve lost
Sadness is long gone
Depression is me
Darkness pitch black
Cold as my is heart is feeling
Storm with rain and thunder
Depression is me
Alone nowhere to turn
Forced to live in a world with only hate
Only me thoughts to keep me company
Depression is me
I feel it
I am it
It’s my identity
Depression is me
This World Full of Hatred
This world full of hatred
It makes me want to cry
It makes me want to scream
This world full of hatred
Every thing’s impossible to me
This world full of Hatred
It’s trying to kill me
This world full of hatred
It hates me, as you can see
Hollywood
Lights. Camera. Action!
Audition at five, I’m late
No! I didn’t make the cut
Dream crusher
Heart breaker
Bad bot type
Show biz
Role play
Method acting
Scene one take two
Lines slurred
Cut!
You can be replaced
Let me try again
No third chances
Clouds Over My Head
Clouds over my head
White and gray
Clouds over my head
Moving slow in the day
Staying still in the night
Not letting up even a hint of moonlight
Clouds over my head
Blocking the blue sky’s
Shading the sunlight
Clouds over my head
Look into My Eyes (#2)
Look into my eyes
What do you see?
Fire burning
Smoke rising
Water falling
Flames that won’t die out
Look into my eyes
What do you see?
Anger
Despare
Sadness
Depression
Darkness
Death
Look into my eyes
What do you see?
Me
Me
I am a tree
Blossoming and blooming
Tall and firm
Me
I’m a flower
Delicate and pretty
Small but brave
Me
I’m the wind
Cold and fast
Blowing everything out of her path
Untouched and unseen
Me
I’m beautiful and intelligent
I’m a young girl
I am me
I am…
I am…
A caged bird
Crying in silver
Wondering when I’ll be free
I am…
A single rose
Covered in thorns
Petal by petal I break
I am…
The sky
Blue, sad and full of clouds
Staring down at hatred
I am…
A girl
Small
Emotional
But hidden
I am…
Who I am
What I am
I am… Me.
Hidden
I am
Hidden in darkness
Trapped in despair
Burned by anger
Beaten by depression
I am
Hidden
Trapped
Burned
Beaten
Broken
But I prefer to stay hidden
Unseen and out of sight
Just as far away as possible from this ignorant world
But all I can think of is to hide
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140,571 Literary Works • 673,487 Reviews
I am so sorry I didnt get to this sooner! But Vivian, I absolutely love this
I mean, really, I should be looking up to you... you're such a great writer. Lordy,I like this a lot!
Stop it, I'm embarrassed.
But thanks
Really, you did great c:
What is this?
"Smoke rising
Water falling
Flames that won’t die out
Look into my eyes
What do you see?
Anger
Despare
Sadness
Depression
Darkness
Death"
I don't see any of this actually you force-fed it down my throat by telling me what you are without any evidence that you are it. This might sound silly but I think 'I can come up with my own conclusions. It just goes on and on talking about random stuff, theres almost no point to it.
"But I prefer to stay hidden
Unseen and out of sight"
No you don't actually, you just PROVED otherwise.
Don't you think it would be better poem where you are trying *wink wink* to seem happy but you are this-- and you just tell us the real thoughts of you other then telling us what you are blandly?
See the idea is there but you need to devolpe it, this doesn't feel very honest to me.
Hey there, lyricalrebel here to review your work. This poem is awesome. Two of the facts that it has only a few reviews is because the title is not that catchy and the short description is intended to attract the readers. See, I am the kind of writer who would want a poem to attract me even though it shouldn't be like that
Well, your poem is dramatic and I like it. It puts in a lot of emotions. It shows reality, how people suffer from their sorrow. Yes, I can reflect to your poem because as of now, my life is full of hatred.
A lot of people would like me to change me and when I read these lines:
"I am...
Who I am
What I am
I am... Me."
I felt at ease, knowing that I'm not the only one who would want to scream those words to the world.
The flow of your poem is good but take care of the sequencing from the darkness of your poem to hollywood then back to the darkness. Lines that will introduce new ideas should be inserted but frankly, your poem flowed good as I've said. Well, put in some punctuation marks like full stops and commas next time.
Keep writing!
It's actual a few different poems the site just put them like that. I'm glad you liked them though and stay strong. #1Depression is me #2 This World Full of Hatred #3Hollywood #4Clouds Over My Head #5 Look Into My Eyes #6 Me and #7 Hidden
Hey! Great efforts! A looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong poem I must say. Though there are a few mistakes you need to correct. Why dont you revise your poem and check for errors. A few grammar mistakes. A few more efforts and it be great. All it needs is some modification and that is it.
I do not think one must write like this in poetry
I am
Hidden
Trapped
Burned
Beaten
Broken
Maybe you could take two words at a time For example:-
Hidden and trapped I am
And Burned And beaten
And Broken In Two.
Hope That Helped