We live
live quietly
quietly we die
die and then cry
cry all the time
time just leaves us behind
behind we leave
leave all the memories
the precious memories
so precious is your smile
so smile all the time
as time waits for no tide
and tides come and go
go do so sorrow
sorrows are succeeded by joy
enjoy and leave a mark behind
be the change you want to see
then no matter if you die
you left a legacy behind
for the sake of some smiles
smiles of random people
who will accompany you
in the heaven.
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141,342 Literary Works • 674,354 Reviews
Hello, Tammi. I enjoyed this but I don't think this passes as a poem. I don't mean to sound uncaring or judgmental but you should work on this. There isn't any punctuation or capitalization. The format is a bit deterring also. The words were very well thought out but you stopped going with your pattern which confused me. It would be nice if you added words that rhymed also. You don't have to of course just my personal preference. Keep writing!
~Keepwriting
Hey there!
Beautiful- that's what this poem is. I mean you just wowed me with this. It's perfect in every manner. I really appreciate the thought you put behind it and thanx for conveying such an important message in such a mesmerizing manner. I love the way you started this poem. I like the way it flows.
So yeah thanx for sharing it!
Fangirl~
Thanks a bunch!! that was really encouraging!