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125,005 Literary Works • 672,797 Reviews
What a neat series fortis! I'm not sure why I hadn't ran into these before, or maybe I had and just forgot? Either way, I'm glad I saw these - love your poetry!
I mean... they totally commanded the literary spotlight for a hot minute back in 2014 lol wow I can't believe that was 6 years ago what???
My heart.....*sniff*....has been touched T_T
Hey, fortis!
Wow, the formatting of this poem is certainly unique. Well. The whole poem is unique! I'll have to read the rest to understand this but I'll comment on the rest of this work.
I like how this is poem set out as a story. I assume that is what you are trying to do, it has that sort-of essence about it that screams: "this is a story of a man who needs to be heard about, he needs to be know about", maybe that is why there are so many parts to this story-like poem. It is highly interesting. I am curious, like a story, I am asking the "how did he die? How old was he? Why a feather carved into the headstone? How can a feather summon the moon?"
I also like how your poem is a free versed poem. It is almost as if you are telling me that this guy is free now that he is dead, like his spirit can travel where ever it wants to, maybe all the burdens he had all vanished when he died, so that responsibility was lifted off on his shoulders and now he is free in that sense. This poem is so open to interpretation. I am so curious. I really want to read the other parts now. I feel empty because I need to know the rest.
Yours sincerely,
Traunt
This poem is very engaging/interesting for many reasons. The first reason is obviously formatting. Your line breaks and spacing is very unique. At first it seems sort of awkward, but as you dive deeper into the poem, it becomes very rhythmic--a sort of soothing beat in the background. I'm no poetry expert, and I don't know if this was a conscious choice, but "summoning the moon to him" may be redundant and sounds a little awkward. However, it's 100% your choice. Great poem!
-IronSpark