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why hide

by Quillfeather


why must we hide 

why must we pretend 

why do we always act like someone we're not 

why do we say who we like or dislike just to be popular

why 

some do it to be accepted 

but is it not  better to be accepted for who you  really are 

be your self

be who you are 

be who you will be and be free


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Wed Jan 11, 2023 6:45 pm
AkuRashomon wrote a review...



Hi, hello there! This is Ina speaking. I am here to give you a comment/review for your poem. I wanted to review something in the Green Room I couldn't find poems or stories that were for my age so I went to your account to check some stuff. By the way, I like your bio. Anyways, let's get into it.

The lines:

"why must we hide

why must we pretend

why do we always act like someone we're not

why do we say who we like or dislike just to be popular

why

some do it to be accepted"

Just ask people why they hide when they can be themselves instead. I makes me imagine a person telling me these questions in a comedic way, "why?" Then I read this:

"but is it not better to be accepted for who you really are

be your self

be who you are

be who you will be and be free"

The line "Be yourself" is overrated but I think this poem made me like it. The lines tell about being free and who you are can just inspire you in many different ways. When you're feeling down, don't have the motivation to do something, or in doing anything. If anyone is sad or upset or overwhelmed, you should read this.

Thank you for sharing this wonderful poem. Have a good morning, day, afternoon, or night.




Quillfeather says...


Thank you for your review! Glad you liked it! (And my bio lol)



AkuRashomon says...


You're welcome!



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Sun Sep 25, 2022 4:03 am
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LadyBug wrote a review...



Hi TrinityPoeting, Jade here to leave you a short review on your old (but cute!) poem. Let's get straight into it.

Stanza one: you're spitting facts. Though the flow feels a bit weird (if you read it aloud, you'll see what I mean) the message itself is very true. I often feel like poems include a lot of metaphors, so I like how unique this one is.

Stanza two: your choice to start the stanza with a random statement feels off. It's giving us the answer instead of letting us choose reasons that relate to us and make a poem good. I feel like you could omit this first line and have a stronger poem. That is my only concern, as the rest of it follows a pretty consistent format.


I really liked reading this! I know this work is old, but I hope it still helps somehow!

Jade




Quillfeather says...


Thank you for your review! This was my first poem really and I hope I've improved my poetry lol. But this is still really helpful because I think at the base this is a strong message I still believe in. It's somthing I struggled with then and still do now. So I may try a re-write someday. Thank you for your wonderful feedback!



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Wed Apr 07, 2021 3:36 am
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WishIHadASword wrote a review...



Hello, I'm so very glad I found this poem! I'm going to give it a quick little review because I really think this is a magnificent piece of writing!

One thing I really like is how the first few lines start with WHY and the last few lines start with BE. I'm unaware if this was your intention, but at the beginning, it's like we're questioning. Everyone questions themselves at one time or another and this is about being who you are. So of course, the last lines are just telling us to BE. BE who you are, that's the message you sent to the readers. And that's what makes this so brilliant!

The message you chose to send was so inspiring, especially for people who struggle with being who they are. You're sort of telling them to relax, free yourself, and it doesn't matter if other people think of you differently, at least YOU'LL be happy. I think that's an amazing message that needs to be told more often!

To close, I just want to say that I can definitely feel the emotion in this poem, and it's straight and to the point, which makes it even more impactful. This is a beautiful poem and I'm so glad you wrote it. I'm even more glad I stumbled upon it and got to read it! Thank you so much for the amazing message!

Keep up the awesome work (:




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Wed Apr 07, 2021 3:24 am
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NivedaJames22 wrote a review...



Hey!

I have got no words to describe this poem! I love how it confronts the flaws in ourselves that we hate and hide, and cut ourselves into pieces, just to fit into what they like.

I don't know if this is intentional, but the fact that this is written in free verse just makes it more powerful for me. I feel like it's saying that there's no need to change yourself and squeeze into a pretty rhyme; stay true to yourself and if they don't like that, well, too bad.

I really loved this poem!

Can't wait to read more of your work.

Keep writing.





Too often we crave the extraordinary in life, without even learning how to cherish the ordinary first. Friend, I promise you this: if you can learn to take joy in the simple mundane things in life, the extraordinary will take care of itself, it'll be on its way, hurrying towards you. But if you skip the first part, it'll ever evade you.
— Arcticus