
Written by soundofmind
80 Days B.N.D
It was a sunny morning, and Belxibis was already tired, but homeless smugglers didn't get to sleep in. Not when they had cryptic directions from a client to follow that led them into the forest, far away from civilization, where all the trees looked the same.
Bel stood under a canopy of trees and sighed. He looked up through the overlapping branches at the yellow-orange hue of the sky started fading into blue, and the birds above started chittering, and trees shielded him just enough from the light so that he was not overwhelmed by it.
The trees out here were tall and bushy, like the wild sisters of the ones that grew in gardens, normally trimmed back and tamed. But these ones were dressed proudly in vines and moss and leaves crowded while their arms tangled together like they were imagining what it might be like to be a wall of vines themselves.
Lilith had told him to meet her at the pond where the frogs croaked all day. While it sounded poetic at the time, it was nonspecific, and Belxibis was starting to wonder if this forest even had any ponds or frogs.
He wouldn't have been surprised if it was all a joke.
Sure, send the big blue tiefling off into the forest on a wild goose chase to waste his time. It wasn't like Belxibis had better things to do, like meet other clients who actually wanted what he sold, and actually paid him, and didn't give him riddles by way of a meeting place.
Of course, Belxibis still continued his search.
He bowed his head out from under the low-hanging trees and continued to walk the forest, wishing his staff could be useful for finding dull, normal, non-magical things like toads or frogs for once. But for now, it simply served as a walking stick, and occasionally, assisted in pushing dangling branches and vines out of the way. Those always seemed to catch onto his horns the moment he stopped paying attention, so by now, it was a habit. Lifting his staff, and waving it in front of him just to be sure. Like a cat's whiskers, telling him if he would fit through a passage.
The sun had drifted slowly up
into the sky by the time he finally heard the faint croaking of frogs.
"This better be it,"
he whispered to himself.
He scanned the forest around him, and upon seeing no one was around, he started to whistle a simple tune, almost matching pitch with the frogs as he followed their croaks. As he drew nearer, he could hear other bugs started joining in on the song with creaking and humming.
Finally, he saw it up ahead. The forest parted like it made way to welcome visitors to the little well of stagnant water. He slowed and started searching the thick grasses that lined it, and the area around the pond.
He wasn't late. Lilith said mid-morning, and it was mid-morning. He was grateful he found it in time, and he didn't mind if he had to wait. He just hoped she showed up.
As he walked to the edge of the pond and looked in, he saw the head of a frog slip under the water, and another one leap into the grass, running away. There was one, though, sitting calmly on a rock and soaking up the morning sun.
He wanted to catch it.
He bent down slowly, making sure his armor wouldn't clink too loudly as to scare it, and then very carefully reached out his hand. Slowly... slowly... hovering over the frog's shoulders.
The frog appeared curious when his shining silver gauntlet appeared in front of it, and it looked like, given some time and patience, the frog might hop in.
"I don't suppose tieflings eat frogs, now, do they?"
Lilith's voice appeared behind him with little announcement, but it sang a sour-sweet tune. With neither flinching nor jumping, he slowly got to his feet and turned around to see her. For someone so committed to cryptic secrecy, it was no surprise she was light on her feet. Or that she might've used a spell to conceal her presence until now. He wasn't sure which. Maybe both.
He smiled sweetly for Lilith and laughed. It was a very practiced reaction.
"Good morning Lilith. I have the Vial of Stardust for you," he said.
He towered over her by at least a foot, not including his horns, which reached a few more inches into the sky out from his forehead.
For someone meeting in the middle of the forest, she looked a bit overdressed. She had a traveling cloak and a small leather sack on her back, but her dark velvet dress looked like it would be doomed to snag on something, and from there it's resale value would only plummet.
Oh well, that was none of his concern.
Lilith looked up at him, eyes lingering on his horns. "Well, no need to waste time. Bring it out, then. Show me," she said.
Bel nodded, and slipped his
large pack off his shoulders, plopping it on the ground in front of him.
He kneeled beside his bag, set
his staff on the ground, and unbuckled the flap, and reached in to pull out the
Vial of Stardust.
As Bel presented it, he couldn't help but have the feeling that he did something wrong. Lilith looked disappointed.
"That's it?" she said.
"It's what you asked for," Bel replied.
"That's not nearly enough," Lilith retorted.
"Well, times are hard, and finding stardust is hard. This is what I've got," Bel said.
Lilith frowned with her hands on her hips.
"I don't care about hard," she said, narrowing her eyes at him. "I just want what I asked for."
Bel blinked. He did get what she asked for. She never said she wanted a lot. Either something had changed on her end, he misunderstood, or she had been to unclear with her expectations from the start. Either way, he had what he had. He couldn't magically multiply it. But maybe he could remedy the situation another way.
"Alright," Bel said, putting up one hand in an earnest gesture. "How about this. I don't have more stardust, but I have plenty of other things you might be interested in that are very similar or of equal value."
Lilith's frown deepened, but Bel reached into his bag anyway, pulling out a tuft of lion's mane. Useful for the Elixir of Lion's Roar.
"How about this?"
Lilith turned her nose up at it.
"Okay, how about this?"
A Potion of Bloodlust. She still didn't look impressed. He kept fishing.
"This?"
A bottle of elven tears.
"No," she said adamantly.
"This? This? This?"
At this point, he was amassing a pile outside of his bag, and he could tell Lilith wasn't amused by his efforts. He pulled out one last thing. It was a bracelet with a rune-carved stone. When the user attuned to it the bracelet would make it so anything their hand touched left no prints. He lifted it up with an earnest smile.
"How about this?"
And then, he heard a bell toll. For a second, he thought he saw a flash of light. Orange? Like the sun had shone in his eyes, somehow, without blinding him.
His eyes fluttered, and he shook his head a little.
"Wait, what?" Lilith sputtered.
"What?" Bel echoed.
"What was that?" Lilith asked, squinting and looking at him more closely.
"The bells?" Bel asked.
"The--" Lilith's face contorted in frustrated confusion and she shook her head. "No! The- your eyes--"
Bel looked up at her, genuinely clueless.
If she meant that his eyes were inhuman, he would've thought she'd have noticed already. Yeah. He had no irises or pupils as humans did. Just golden orbs that creeped people out. He knew that already. He really didn't need to hear it again.
An awkward silence followed, and Lilith looked like she was mulling over something in her head. Bel decided to cut the tension.
"Alright," he said,
starting to pack his things back up. "Obviously, you don't want anything
besides the stardust, so how about I just get you more of it. If you want to
come with me, we should be able to find it within the day. I'll have to
backtrack, but my staff should help us get there quickly."
Lilith folded her arms and
sighed, watching him with a critical gaze as he slung his pack back over his
shoulders, picked his staff back up, and secured the straps over his armor.
"Fine," Lilith snapped. "But this better be worth my time."
Belxibis smiled down at her and gestured with his staff for her to start walking first.
"You won't have to worry about that, Ms. Lilith. I can assure you, I am not in the business of wasting time."

The stone on Bel's staff was starting to pulse faster, and Lilith was starting to walk slower. He imagined she didn't often go on long walks through the forest.
"That thing is anxiety-inducing," Lilith muttered, looking to the staff.
"You think so?" Bel said. "I find it rather endearing."
Lilith rolled her eyes. "I imagine you find a lot of unsavory things endearing."
Bel took in a slow breath and was glad when he spotted the cave in the distance as a convenient distraction.
"Ah. There it is," he said, pointing with the tip of his still pulsing staff. "In the depths of that cave, there is a meteorite that crashed and was buried some who-knows-how-many eons ago. If I dig back in to find it, we may just find more stardust. After crawling through many spiderwebs and kicking away various critters, of course."
Lilith's lips were curled up in disgust.
"I am not doing that," she said. "That's what I'm paying you for."
Bel nodded with understanding. "Yes. Of course."
Their pace came to a brief stop as the two of them looked on at the cave in the distance. The cave opening wasn't very tall, so Belxibis already knew he'd have to go in on all fours. He already did that yesterday, but he supposed he'd have to do it again. As Lilith said, she was paying him, and it was part of the job.
"Well, get going then," Lilith urged.
"Yes," Bel said, taking a step forward. "I'll be just a--"
Another bell tolled, and this one thundered throughout his skull like a gong.
With no further warning, Belxibis collapsed to the ground.
End of chapter
Continue to next chapter Aether's Heart 5Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
Hello, Mordax again. I'm just going to be spamming you with reviews today because I have missed so many chapters.
Let's jump right in!
"to follow" is a bit redundant. I would suggest removing it.
I struggled reading through this description. I love what you are getting at, but I would suggest rewording it just a bit. For example, instead of "at the yellow-orange hue of the sky started fading into blue", it could be "where the yellow-orange hue of the sky met the blue" or something like that. After that, I would suggest ending the sentence and beginning the descriptions of the birds and his sense of security (which is the vibe I get) as a separate statement.
The two 'and's is unnecessary. Perhaps, "vines, moss, and leaves"?
I love this!! It really shows a glimmer into Belxibis's personality and has a touch of humor.
I absolutely love this paragraph. I read it a few times, that's how much I love it. It so smoothly begins to paint a picture of who (and what) Belxibis is. It has beautiful description and is very intriguing, drawing me in so I want to know more.
"around him" is redundant.
OMG!! This chapter is stunning. I was sucked in all throughout and was so sad when it ended. What happened?
I love Belxibis already. He seems so nuanced and gentle despite his appearance seeming quite the opposite. The writing is beautiful and so perfectly captivates him so that I feel like I'm truly there with Bel, feeling what he feels and seeing what he sees. I love how you sprinkle in more and more descriptors throughout, making it easy to read and follow. I can't wait to see more of this character.
Quick question: How do you all come up with the names? Whenever I write, it is one of the things I struggle with the most. All of the names are so unique in your chapters and somehow seem to captivate the characters just as well as your descriptions do. Amazing job.
Mordax
I am looking through the other comments and seeing some people suggesting to add more emotion. I don't know if you have done so before I read this today, but I thought there was a perfect amount of emotion added. It was added in a natural way, such as the way he saw certain aspects of his environment or how he spoke and behaved. Of course, you can disregard this completely, lol
Hey Mordax, this is a super SUPER belated comment because I didn't see this until now (lmao) but :^) thank you so so much for this review. I'm the writer for this chapter and character!! Your feedback was encouraging and I'm very glad you enjoyed the chapter and my character Belxibis so much.
Hi Vincian and sound!
I'm just starting to feel a bit impatient because I want to know where this is going! I feel like some of these sections could have been condensed together into one part, so the intros didn't feel like they dragged on quite as long, even though it's only been four chapters. Having five perspective characters is a daunting task!
I really enjoyed reading this section and meeting Belxibis ^^ You've have a good handle on his voice, I feel like, and while I agree with MissGangamesh that there could be some more sprinkle of emotions throughout, there is clearly a consistent tone here, and I enjoy it! The biggest thought when I finished reading, though, was that I just don't know how this is going to connect to the rest of the characters. Clearly, you all have a plan as this is a well thought out collaboration, but from a novel standpoint this part felt really disconnected in some sense.
Here's what I mean: every chapter so far has had some loose threads tying them together, from the bells to the city of Syna (which was mentioned as a mining capital to tie in Railyn). This chapter didn't have any mention of Syna, and I didn't have any concept of where these events were taking place in relation to everyone else. How far are these forests from the market? Are they still on the mountain where the mining takes place? Also, the fact that Belxibis was actually affected by the bells seems really significant, and I'm kind of disappointed that there is still more introductions after this chapter. In my mind, this being the most significant case of the bells tolling makes a case for it being better suited as the last one. Everyone else just kind of registered it as odd and then went about on their day!
The descriptions in this section are really pretty, I would like to add! The forest is described really vividly in my mind, and it's easy to read since it flows very well. Nice job on that! ^^
I'm not sure how to feel about Lilith, and I'm not sure how I'm supposed to feel about Lilith? I don't know how important she is going to be to the rest of the story, but she's dancing this line between familiarity and unfamiliarity. Have Bel and Lilith done business before? Also, Bel is trying to be very accommodating, probably because he doesn't want to lose a customer, but is Lilith's service that important to him? He was making comments about Lilith not even paying him, so why is she so huffy about him going to do what she wanted him to do? I would have liked to see a bit more emphasis on the important parts of their relationship and maybe more hints on what is to come. Right now, I feel very in the dark as a reading, because each chapter had just been kind of a repeat of the same format (and for an SB, this is fine! But for a novel, it doesn't feel as fine.) This isn't necessarily on you, just my thoughts as a reader, haha.
As a whole, though, this was a good section
I look forward to the next part! Happy writing~
~Wolfe
Totally get how reading this from a book/chapter vibe vs SB vibe is different and changes the reading experience. I appreciate the feedback!!
As for the whole Lillith thing - she's not a recurring character, and I think at the time when I wrote this (at least a year ago now lol) I wasn't trying to develop the relationship much lmao. But your questions you brought up would probably make me tweak the interactions a little for clarity in hindsight.
HERE'S MY SUPER BELATED REPLY AND THANK YOU!!
Hay y'all! Sorry if this is super short or something, I'm on my phone :P
I definitely need some reassurance on saying this name. Bell-csee-uhs? Maybe? ;-; Help me out nag dudes.
Interesting... Very interesting... Plenty of annoyance, I see, not a bad mind, either... I think I'll like Bel! Really loved this chapter and the way he was fleshed out. You also got me to remembering what a Tiefling was cause I haven't had to.think about those in absolutely AGES. Not a common race in the things I've read, sadly.
Have a nice (*insert time of day here*)!!!
I'm glad you like Bel, hahah. I pronounce his name as Belk-sibis. :,)
This is a very interesting piece of work, and I like the way that you have given descriptions of Blexibis through sentences and his actions. You have given good details of the forest and his environment, allowing the audience to really picture Blexibis and what role he plays. Reading this, I can vividly see the events unplaying in my head.
I especially loved it when you illustrated Blexibis' annoyance through the line: 'sure send the big blue tiefling off into the forest on a wild goose chase to waste his time...' because it adds that bit of sarcasm and even though it wasn't written in first-person, you can really relate to the character.
Well done on this piece of work:)
Thanks, illy!
Back again.

' He looked up through the overlapping branches at the yellow-orange hue of the sky started fading into blue, and the birds above started chittering, and trees shielded him just enough from the light so that he was not overwhelmed by it.' - this is a really long sentence that doesn't read right. I'd suggest cutting it up.
I like how you introduced Bel not being human slowly throughout the chapter. It felt very fluid and smooth. I think it would be good to know who Lilith is exactly, and what their relationship is because the whole interaction falls a bit flat as I don't really feel like I know either of them.
Like the last chapter, there is a lot of telling but no showing. It's written sort of like a film, there's not much going on internally with the characters. It makes me as a reader not feel connected to them. I want to feel what they are feeling. There's not much emotion in this interaction at all, and on top of not really knowing who they are to each other, it all feels a bit vague and wishy washy.
Maybe we could know how Lilith found him? It would also help establish how Bel's business works and the types of people who seek him out. It all just needs a bit more fleshing out.
Hope this helps
mmmm yes yes good I will pump emocean into writing jus for u
I also do tend to write like things are a film lol cuz that's how I imagine it ... I want to feel like I'm in movie. But yes some little details I think could help add clarity for the things u wanna know, I take notes now
tank u and bless
wow what a great chapter fantastic