Young Writers Society

Hey friend! Wow, I sure love your poetry. I thought I would stop by and leave you a review. Lets jump right into it:

Simply, to me, this poem seems to say "there's no sacrifice great enough for me". I feel like you feel a lot of guilt, perhaps for things you've done and you almost feel sorry because you feel that there's no one who has ever felt your pain before. Christianity, it said that Jesus Christ died and sacrificed himself for every pain and sin and inflection, that he felt it all while he was on the cross.

Because there was never

a sacrifice great enough.

And I’m sorry.

Hi!

Ooooh, I actually like the ambiguity of the poem, lol. There is definitely a sense of pain in this poem... like there's a call of suffering which I like. After all, did Jesus Christ literally ask us to take up our crosses and follow him? This isn't a call to an idyllic life... it is a call toward pain and suffering. So I like that there is a call toward suffering... a lot of Christian poetry doesn't necessarily do this and only talks about peace, so that's a nice change. I like religious poems that deal with difficult things,b because Christianity is all about dealing with difficult things.

My one big comment is that this poem is literally called "Jesus Christ" and... there's not a lot of biblical allusions? Like, as a devout Christian, it seems really flat. There's a reference to the cross and a reference to sacrifice, but it's... really boring. Like, in my faith (I am a Catholic) the word "sacrifice" immediately calls to mind the high point of the mass... where Jesus Christ's body and blood is consumed in the Eucharist. And like... there's nothing that really delves into that. Also, there's a brief mention to the cross and... that is it.

But all this can be forgiven... except the ocean metaphor is really... dry. Like, water in the bible is such a symbolic thing that occurs throughout the entire course of salvation history. To demonstrate, here is what is said in every Catholic baptism...

Father, you give us grace through sacramental signs, which tell us of the wonders of your unseen power. In baptism we use your gift of water, which you have made a rich symbol of the grace you give us in this sacrament. At the very dawn of creation your Spirit breathed on the waters, making them the wellspring of all holiness. The waters of the great flood you made a sign of the waters of baptism, that make an end of sin and a new beginning of goodness.

Through the waters of the Red Sea you led Israel out of slavery, to be an image of God's holy people, set free from sin by baptism. In the waters of the Jordan your Son was baptized by John and anointed with the Spirit. Your Son willed that water and blood should flow from his side as he hung upon the cross.

After his resurrection he told his disciples: "Go out and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit." Father, look now with love upon your Church, and unseal for her the fountain of baptism. By the power of the Spirit give to the water of this font the grace of your Son. You created man in your own likeness: cleanse him from sin in a new birth to innocence by water and the Spirit.

[The celebrant touches the water with his right hand and continues:]

We ask you, Father, with your Son to send the Holy Spirit upon the water of this font. May all who are buried with Christ in the death of baptism rise also with him to newness of life. We ask this through Christ our Lord.

Oh wow, I’m not Christian myself but the emotion in this poem is chilling to the bone-it’s so raw with emotion that I felt my throat get dry and my heart clench slightly. Wow! Especially the ocean part, it was wonderful because it showed almost that even a heavenly being like Jesus can’t do anything to help the world and its inhabitants if the people themselves don’t want anything to do with being kind, respectful and loyal. In the end, it’s up to people and their priorities! Well done this is so deep and honestly I relate SO much.

Oh wow, I’m not Christian myself but the emotion in this poem is chilling to the bone-it’s so raw with emotion that I felt my throat get dry and my heart clench slightly. Wow! Especially the ocean part, it was wonderful because it showed almost that even a heavenly being like Jesus can’t do anything to help the world and its inhabitants if the people themselves don’t want anything to do with being kind, respectful and loyal. In the end, it’s up to people and their priorities! Well done this is so deep and honestly I relate SO much.

If this is how you truely feel I'm quite sad for you.

Jesus has given me hope and helped me get through many dark times in my life. I have found so much joy in serving someone who loved me enough to die so that his perfect life would be counted as my own.

I hope you see his love for you someday, but as sad as it may be, He decided to leave the decision of belief up to each of us. All I can do is pray you experience his love.

May you be blessed and find joy.

Hello, Mint! Wist here with a review. ^^

This poem represents quite an interesting take on the tale of Jesus Christ and his sacrifice for humanity's salvation. The poem's meaning is very much up to the reader's interpretation, which is a fascinating way to write a poem, so I commend you for doing that. With that said, let's look at a couple of lines from your poem.

I can only hand you a cup of saltwater
And ask you to share a drink with me.

Because there was never
a sacrifice great enough.
And I’m sorry.

There is only pain
enough for us all to have our fill.

I can only hand you a cup of saltwater
And ask you to share a drink with me.