Fingers twitch
Sharp breath in
Must stay calm
Keep it in.
Breathing slows
Eyes wander
Mind strayes
Start to ponder.
What happes next?
Gotta peek
Want to see:
Will they meet?
Head turns
Cringing slightly
Gotta stay
Strong and mightey
Seconds pass
Nothing...
Craving stops?
If only...
Pressure builds
Muscles tense
Start fo fidget
It's so imense!
Untill no longer
Can hold it in
Reaches out
As head startes to spin
Pages ruffle
Eyes skim
Oh, no!
It can't be him
Then becoming aware
By my weakness
I sod it all
For the lust of completeness
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139,505 Literary Works • 672,592 Reviews
I really do believe you have captured what I go through every day xD
The language is beautiful, however, I found myself wishing for something more when I was reading it...I don't know why. Maybe that was the point of the poem?
Anyways, I think that the poem could have benefitted from the use of commas and periods and such. I understand there are some poems where you don't want any grammar, but I think it would add a certain beat to this.
Job well done, happy writing (:
thanks. I guess you may be right there Lavvi . . . never thought about it, good call haha
Hi there. Lavvi in to review.
I myself am sneaky like this, and perhaps it's my biggest downfall with relation to books. But whatever.
I think perhaps a lot of of readers can relate to this
I think it was nice how you used simple, mostly one to two-word lines. It made the reading simpler, more straightforward. Because a craving isn't quite complicated, it was a great representation. But, the fifth stanza seems slightly unfinished. It kind of blocks this rising sense of eagerness that you've now created for the reader. Personally, I find it a little useless in the poem.
Yours,
Lavvi
hahaha.....this is cool man! You're witty (you know how hard it is to be one when it comes to writing poems;)).
I go through this everyday - so I can relate completely.
Well-written.
Thanks lele253isme, I guess I just came up with it whilst daydreaming
. Thanks for the coments guys, and i agree, I did kind of run out of my ideas as i neared the end (I admit). But i guess i liked the idea of writing about books 
thanks for the corrections and advise 
I just did some basic spell check.
Now, onto the actual poem.
I'll be honest: it started off really nicely - good rhyme, good rhythm, short, snappy. Towards the end it seems you can't keep it up, you can't think of new rhymes or even short words. Take a look at the first half, then the second half. They're so different. Keep - the - rhythm - the - same. It'll make it much more poignant.
Anyway, let's see what you can come up with. This has potential. Use it!
Keep writing!
Hello there. I am Ehte, here for the review. Firstly to say, i did not quite like this poem of yours. It lacks rhythm. It has no flow and many grammatical mistakes are there. The title and the poem have no connection at all and some of the lines are totally unnecessary. And you use a lot of period. Only one period(.) is enough after completion of a line.
Keep writing is all i can say.
I like this poem. it describes what I go through basically every day, really. And I think that maybe you had either you had deep experience or something in this series of events or you just happened to come upon the idea while skimming a book. Either way good, good, good is all I have to say. And also, the thing most of us YWSers say, keep writing.