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Preface: My Last Words

by BEWriter


Sometimes life’s hard, you know? You just look back on your day and you’ve realized you haven’t done anything, whether you’ve tried to get things done or just sat on your bed watching Netflix, either way you feel sluggish. That’s how I feel a lot. Mostly it is me sitting on my bed, but I just wish I would have done something productive. Even though you get to wonder how your life could possibly go on this way, you make a mistake and believe there is no changing it, you hear at least once in your life one quote. There’s always tomorrow.

But is there really? If someone told me that right now I’d probably laugh in their face.

I’ve made mistakes. Mistakes I’ll never be able to repent for. I always thought there will be a tomorrow. I can always do that next week, next year, when I’m an adult. But how do I know?

We all know that we’re going to die someday. Do we actually believe it though? Practically everyone looks upon their, thinking they’ll all have long lives. They don’t live life to the fullest because they always think they’ll have their entire life of eighty, maybe ninety years to go on adventures, make emends, do everything we believe we’ll have the opportunity to do. We don’t believe we won’t have enough time until we’re on the deathbed itself.

When we finally realize the mistake we’ve made, the stupid procrastination that took us over, it makes everything that much harder. Sure some of us believe that they will be life after death, a moment where we are judged for the life we’ve lived. A time where we can learn what is right, and how to be perfect. But then it gets to the time where you can’t change your life, and that’ll be what happened.

This isn’t a lecture, I’m one hundred percent guilty of everything I have said. This is a warning. A warning not to live the way I have, and realize at the last possible second that you did wrong.

I don’t want you to end up like me. At the edge of death and no way to get out of it.

This is my story, and how I got to where I am now.


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User avatar
7 Reviews


Points: 320
Reviews: 7

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Thu Jan 07, 2016 12:05 am
SilkyDark wrote a review...



Reading through this, there are definitely some strong positives. Alternatively, there are also some negatives, but none are incredibly drawing on the story.

To start off, I felt that while this is a pretty good jumping point for an extended story, it could have had a little more in the way of details concerning what we'll get to read next. Something more to connect us with this character (who in all honesty seems fairly relatable); a name, maybe, or something in the way of personality. Other than that, the sufficiently vague starts have piqued my interest.

From a writing point of view, this is also quite good. With the exception of the missing 'life' and a few sentences that I feel could have been separated, there are no major flaws.

Good luck, and I look forward to reading the next installment.




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271 Reviews


Points: 208
Reviews: 271

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Wed Jan 06, 2016 2:13 pm
Charm wrote a review...



Hi!
My name is Rachel, but most people call me Mad
I have a feeling this is going to be short because I couldn't find much "wrong".

#8000BF ">Plot, Pace and Point of View
I really like the way the plot is going and I think the point of view works perfectly. I usually hate first point of view because most writers mess it up, but you did a wonderful job.

#8000BF ">Characters and Dialogue
I already feel connected somehow to your main character/narrator even though I don't even know he's/her name.

#8000BF ">Grammar

Sometimes life’s hard, you know? You just look back on your day and you’ve realized you haven’t done anything, whether you’ve tried to get things done or just sat on your bed watching Netflix, either way you feel sluggish. That’s how I feel a lot. Mostly it is me sitting on my bed, but I just wish I would have done something productive. Even though you get to wonder how your life could possibly go on this way, you make a mistake and believe there is no changing it, you hear at least once in your life one quote. There’s always tomorrow.

These should be two different paragraphs.
Spoiler! :
Sometimes life’s hard, you know? You just look back on your day and you’ve realized you haven’t done anything, whether you’ve tried to get things done or just sat on your bed watching Netflix, either way you feel sluggish.

That’s how I feel a lot. Mostly it is me sitting on my bed, but I just wish I would have done something productive. Even though you get to wonder how your life could possibly go on this way, you make a mistake and believe there is no changing it, you hear at least once in your life one quote. There’s always tomorrow.

Practically everyone looks upon their, thinking they’ll all have long lives.

I think you forgot the word 'life'.
Spoiler! :
Practically everyone looks upon their life, thinking they’ll all have long lives.


#8000BF ">Advice and Suggestions
I don't have any suggestion or advice to give you. This was really good.

Good Job on this chapter!
If you ever need more reviews: MadWriter7's Spectacular Reviews!
~Rachel, The Mad Writer





Justice is the fragrance that the onion gives to the eyes of the one who has cut it.
— Arc Twain