Strangers

Heyo, It's xJ just checking out your work.

This was a huge improvement from another work of yours I reviewed. This poem is great besides a few spelling errors. 5th line from the top: "and now were faded away" should be spelled: "And now we're faded away." One simple apostrophe makes a huge difference! 8th line from the top: "Is it not" would work better if you took off the "not." And 3 lines below that should have a question mark rather than a period at the end.

Praises: This poem is VERY relatable. Which Is wonderful, because you want your audience to feel that they connect with you. And this topic makes me feel the emotion and sadness you go through in this poem. It's a work of art, just try to improve the spelling, punctuation and such.

My favorite lines: "like two leaves falling down from a tree in the autumn."
"I feel broken and empty with knowledge that you have moved on and I have not."
"Is it crazy that I want to go back to the past and change this endless silence of us strangers?"

Great work! Just proofread before you upload! Double-check your spelling.
May your travels through space and time be merry,

-xJ ❤︎

I like it I can relate, I've lost many friends and wished we were still friends

I enjoy this poem. I remember when I walked everywhere with one person, and then she met someone else and ditched me. I always think of how we talked and such. She doesn't even look at me anymore. When I call her out on it, she denies everything. I miss her, badly, but she doesn't.
It kills me and this poem helped me realize I'm not the only one. Eventually, I will get over it. This poem is a great piece. It shows that we all have gone through this and we will heal.
And for that, I thank you.

I know there is beauty in simplicity, but I feel as if this is too simple. I feel like you could have gone back and added more details to spice it up, even some more imagery; especially with the line when you were talking about the two fallen leaves. Also the beginning is kind of odd. It kind of started funny, like the fourth line doesn't really make sense with the beginning three lines. To me, it would have made more sense for you to talk about what had driven you two apart, or what had happened before you mentioned that you were best friends.

"Is it unfortunate that you may not even care,
that it makes me deeply sad." <---make sure you put a question mark after questions, don't worry, I do that all the time.

Great job, love.

Good poem, but I do have a few nitpicks and a few slight opinions.

OPINIONS:

Opinion 1. When you say the words...

Like two leaves falling down from a tree in Autumn.

It is unfortunate that you may not even care,
that is makes me deeply sad?

7/10

Hello, Amindor!
I would like to start out this review by pointing how good your organizing is, when it came t pacing! The structural section is magnificent and I feel like you as a writer has that to your advantage - with examples explaining how heartbroken you are, it really makes us empathize as readers.

Now, when it came across towards the mid piece of the poem, some of the writing became repetitive; let alone it could be your style, I do not know. Nonetheless, it was highly enjoyable.

A truly heartfelt and kind of heartbreaking poem indeed! It made me sad reading it, but I'm guessing that was the intent, so that's a point for you.

While I enjoyed reading this poem, and it flows very nicely, I was often interrupted by the lack of periods. Is that purposeful, or was it just something that happened? Either way, I feel like it would read a little better if it had some periods and/or commas at the end of the lines in the stanzas (like "with knowledge that you have moved on,/and I have not./").

This line is also a bit odd. "Is it unfortunate that you may not even care,/

that it makes me deeply sad?"

I think that if it's supposed to be a single sentence, the comma should be removed (grammatically, it's incorrect). If it's not supposed to be a single sentence or go together, there should probably be some kind of punctuation mark at the end of the first line. Again, this is assuming that this was a mistake, not intentional.

I also noticed an issue with "and now were faded away"; if you meant to say "we're" there should be an apostrophe.

The last issue I see with this poem is in the line "I'm too afraid to walk up to you and say hi". "Hi" should be enclosed by quotation marks, unless, of course, you left them out intentionally.

This poem is very good, and I enjoy the topic, and with a little structural change and grammar/spelling edits, I think it'll be just perfect. I'll give it a 7/10 for now.

Keep on writing!

Hello!
I love this! Honestly I do!! The name is very appropriate. I only have a couple of nitpicks on this.....
"I feel broken and empty
with knowledge that you have moved on
and I have not"
I believe that you should write it like this with punctuation.
"I feel broken and empty,
with knowledge that you have moved on
and I have not."
(this is just a suggestion, as I am not that good when it comes to punctuation) That is all I have! Hopefully someone else will come along that will give you a better review then mine! Anyway, really nice poem! I love it! Great job, and keep writing!!
-Snazzy