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140,890 Literary Works • 673,704 Reviews
This is interesting. I also agree that the ending isn't as strong as I'd like it to be, but it's really creative. Very intruiging, but it feels like there should be more. All on all, great job1 I liked it a lot!
Very interesting, it flows wonderfully though the ending isn't as strong as I would want it to be. I agree with Alzora. It seems like it should continue. I would work on that. Otherwise it was rather intriguing and definitely the type I would return to to read. Good job!
very interesting
great very interesting
This is really good! I think you're getting better...
You really don't need a exclamation mark here.Just a couple of things....
Your ending is also not very strong. It seems like the story should go on. So, try to see if you can make it more final or if there is still an idea floating around in your mind to add to this story.
Otherwise, great poem. The imagery is amazing and your flow is great up to the last two stanzas!
Keep writing,
Alzora