Hi Tsunami hear.
First of WOW!!!!! You really had me worried there. I really love the title to the story it was simple but it drew me in. So great work. Also I loved the description it was really good. But I would love to help you improve it if you don't mind.
Now the person that is running i would have like more description on them. Like is he or she sweating as they run. Are they struggling to breath as they run because they must be running really fast.
Also I would love to no what the shelter looks like. If it's not to much trouble, because I'm not sure what it is.
I love how you go into there thoughts though it dose give me a sens of urgency. So great work. Over all it was a great story. I really loved it. I hope you very proud of yourself because this is a great peace of work. I hope to read more of your work in the near feature.
I hope you have a great day.
Your friend @Tsunami.
Ps if this didn't help you please let me no, and I'm very sorry.
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Reviews: 616
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