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137,690 Literary Works • 672,059 Reviews
Oh my gods too many feels.
I love this! The references are slotted in really well, and I'm sure it relates to what every PJO/HoO fan feels right now.
The poem combines a somewhat Annabeth-esque 'I'm teasing you but I love you' element while also, as I said, being totally relatable. Keep it up!
Wise girl
Just one more line you could add- just a suggestion:
Hey there! This is one very interesting haiku. I absolutely love this poem, being a fellow Percy Jackson fan(-atic) and find it very cute. I really like that you put in the book reference, since it adds to the "oh it could be Annabeth speaking" thought, and makes the poem more humorous. I know that "yes, it's poetry, you don't have to spell everything correct," but "dam" is spelled wrong. It's fine not changing it, but little errors like that just irritate me for some reason! Percy probably does drool when he's dreaming about Annabeth! *laughs* Well, anyways, adorable haiku, and I enjoyed every part! Thanks for writing this, and have a great day!
Love,
Perks
Gahh <3
<3
I have to use the dam restroom. <3 Yassss!
I'll go to the dam snackbar.
I need the dam bathroom.
I could use some dam French fries.
I love you guys
I want some dam food.
Jazzydracula, you are suddenly the best user ever.
I swear.
I died.
I loved how you noted that Percy drools in his sleep and is a seaweed brain. I also like how you included the inside joke from the Mark of Athena and the Titan's Curse. And is this the point of view of Annabeth?
-wisegirl22
Yes and no. It's my point of view, and Annabeth's, and everyone else who loves Percy.
This whole thing is so sad though. They've been with us for years and now they're going. I hope Rick does a 19 Years Later sort of story some point in the future.
Exactly! Did you know that the Blood of Olympus came out yesterday? Also, I will die when I finish reading it. 1% because it was good and 99% because the series ended.
Yeah I'm reading it. I'll probably die because a character dies XD
Leo? Oh, yeah. The day I found out, I sank into grief when I suddenly realized I was wearing black clothes and started mourning. Mind if I give a teeny spoiler?
Heyo!
I'm here to help get this out of the green room.
First thing's first.
Why did you make this so big? I can read, and if I can't, I can zoom in.
Of course style is up to you, so man, you go do what you want!
So, haiku based on Percy Jackson. I admire that.
First line: Does Percy drool in his sleep? I must have forgotten that he did.
Second line: This is where I realized this was fan fiction (because I never look at the genre things). I think you did a fabulous job with bringing in the references, but still allowing this to sound like an actual poem that could be taken out of context.
Last line: Here is where your emotion kicks in, but I found it rather lacking. First of all, I don't know who "me" is. Is it you? Is it another character in the stories? I know not this much can be said in a haiku format, so I'm giving you some lee-way, I guess. But I wish there was more emotion in the last line somehow. Perhaps you tried to compensate for that with the big font?
Also, maybe think about punctuation? Do you want a period at the end? Do you really want to capitalize every line? You can work with this.
All together, I think it works, for a fanfiction haiku. If this weren't fanfiction, and wasn't a haiku, I would probably have other things to say, but I don't.
Good job on getting the syllables right, and pretend I said Senryu this whole time because it's not a haiku, it's a senryu.
Great job, keep writing!
~fortis
Thanks for the review. I made it so big because it's so small.
What is this? A poem? Could you please tell me the meaning of this poem?
'Go drool in your sleep
And be a dam seaweed brain
Just never leave me'
Sometimes our poems are not good but you didn't write a poem. You just wrote whatever came into your mind.
Haha it is a poem. It's called a Haiku and it's about Percy Jackson.
And poetry can be whatever you THINK. We don't write poetry because it's pretty. We don't need a textbook to write it, it comes from the heart. -or in this case a Percy Jackson fan-
I FEEL THE FEELS
Ahhhh I know =(((((((
*Fandom hugs*