If the World Could Only Love Me Chapter 2 Part 2/2

I wake to the smell of eggs and bacon. Kat must be cooking in the large kitchen downstairs. My stomach complains and gives me mixed messages. I am hungry, but the thought of eating makes me want to be sick. I check my phone, it is 10 am. There are no texts from Valerie.

Sluggishly, I get dressed and I amble down the stairs. My stomach is churning. Again, I’m thinking the same two things. I’m starving; however, the thought of eating makes me want to vomit. Nevertheless, I sit at the nice Kitchen table and watch Kat finish cooking.

“Goodmorning.” She says pleasantly. I smile.

“Whatchya makin’?” I ask. She gestures to the tray of resting bacon and the pan of scrambled eggs. There are waffles in the toaster. Suddenly, the waffles pop out, startling me. She puts them on a plate with a flourish, and adds the scrambled eggs on another platter. Kat immediately puts more waffles in the toaster.

“Kat,” I say. “I think this is way more than enough for two people.” She grimaces and waves her hand.

“No. My brother, Parker got in last night. He always stays out late. He’s always starving and he’s too lazy to get his own breakfast.” I hear a door open upstairs a few seconds later, and heavy footsteps on the stairs. She makes another face. “Speaking of Parker…” He walks into view. I’ve never met Parker. I didn’t even know Kat had a brother.

“Katrina, you really shouldn’t have made so much just for me.” He says jokingly. He’s wearing plaid pajama bottoms and a t-shirt. His black hair is skewed over his face from sleep, and he rubs the sleep from his piercing blue eyes. Parker is tall and thin. He looks over at me and I stare at my hands.

“Hello.” I can tell he nods at me. “What’s your name?” I can hear the smile in his voice. I self consciously smooth my hair and adjust my pajama top. Kat cuts in.

“Parker, this is Dani Williams. Short for Danye. If you call her Danye, though, she’ll bite your head off.” Kat flashes me a grin, and I stand up. I give Parker a timid smile. I can feel his eyes on me as I move around the kitchen, taking out fruit and orange juice while Kat prepares our plates. When I sit down Kat puts a plate in front of me. There are two plain, whole wheat waffles, three pieces of crisp bacon, yellow scrambled eggs and some fruit. I look at her incredulously while my stomach turns.

“Kat, I can’t eat all of this.” I widen my eyes at her. She glances at my plate. When Parker’s back is turned She spoons one of the waffles, a piece of bacon and some scrambled eggs off my plate. I look at her with my best puppy dog eyes. She points at my plate firmly. I have no choice. Kat is going to make me eat.

I take a deep breath and sit down at the table. I shakily pick up my fork. I wish I could vomit to get myself out of this situation. I know what will happen if I do. Nothing but acid will come up. So I eat a bite of scrambled eggs.

It’s surprisingly good. That only makes me want to puke more. I shouldn’t enjoy food. Food is full of fat and calories. It’s not something I should enjoy. Food is something I eat every once in a while to keep myself alive. It’s something I only eat so I can puke it back up again. Food isn’t heavenly for me. It’s like hell. Right now, I feel the fires of hell churning inside my stomach.

By instinct, I can feel my single bite of eggs threatening to work its way back out of my mouth. Kat stares at my fork which is poised just above my plate. Parker looks over at Kat and I. He sees Kat’s intense look, and my glare of dread at my plate. He gives us an odd look and shakes his head.

“Weird.” He mutters. Then he takes his plate upstairs.

The battle with my eggs quickly resumes. I slowly put bite after bite of eggs into my mouth. The eggs begin to taste better and better. My stomach has a comfortable feeling to it that I haven’t experienced in the longest time. I am getting full. And if I can help it, my food is staying in my stomach.

When I am finished with my eggs, I pick up the lone waffle on my plate. I bite into it and push all the thoughts of carbs and calories out of my head. The waffle has a little crunch to it. I love the texture of the squares on my tongue. I smile a little bit and continue chewing. I finish half the waffle, and I am done. I can already feel my stomach protesting at the food. My mouth waters a sickly sweet taste. I feel my stomach lurching. I run into the bathroom that is located off the kitchen, and empty my first real accomplishment into the toilet. I just ate my first good meal in a long time. I literally threw it in the toilet.

Kat holds my hair as I retch and vomit. With each new retch comes a different pain. My emotional pain is nearly unbearable. My physical pain isn’t much better. But Kat is there for me, and somehow that makes me feel better.

I stand up and flush the toilet. Kat looks at me sadly. She draws me into a hug.

“I’m so sorry, Dani.” She says. “I didn’t know the food would make you-” I waved my hand to silence her.

“Kat, it’s fine Just go clean up, okay? I’ll be there in a minute.”