zohali93

Hi So I just read this and I got to say I like your way of keeping readers informed yet not too informed. Your hook is good. I can't do ...

Hi! So I think there's a strong message you want to get across and though I like your way of describing, there were things that I felt made your message ...

Hey that was good! though I gotta say I was a bit confused about the time. At first I thought she was returning to a place in her past but ...

Wow this is long. It's easier to review shorter chapters so I broke it up into section. This review is for chapter 3. Okay so I've seen some change in ...

Hey. I think that the story is runing to smoothly.Whenever a problem comes up it's like they find a way to solve it almost immediately. Like when they wondered about ...

Hey there this was really lovely. I loved how you used the kitty in this story. It was really adorable and ...wow! The little boys view of the story really ...

hi. I think the voice would look better if written like this: “You can’t stay there forever. You can’t hide forever." It would be more effective and look nice. I ...

wow that was something. Ilike how your first paragraph opened things up. It was hooking from the begining. You explained it so well I could see it hapening in my ...

hi there. :) I think that this part: Whispered lies in tales of old Entangled, hidden truth remains, A tale, a myth, a legend, Of hero's yet discovered, Through hell ...

hey. :) I see that you have some grammatical mistakes here. Maria is all alone at her house, she screams in terror. and . The man kicked open the door ...

Hi there. This is a nice story. I don't like how small the font size it because it's kind of hard to see. Your work looks neat and tidy though. ...

Hi there This poem is simple and says alot. You conveyed your emotions simply and it still sounds like a poem. I like how you would use repetition. It was ...

wow. I loved that especially the ending!! It's so mysterious like I love it. :) It says so much in only a few lines. but I think it could use ...

Hey there. :) I like how you began this peice. It was really interstimg, I must say I think that the idea of Zane being missing is really brouhgt out ...

wow that was really something. I liked how you made it seem like he liked the jar and what his late wife told him. It was true although I think ...