writ3rindisguis3

Wow, this was a very intruiging poem. I liked the rhyming. I agree that it was very powerful. Short and to the point. This is just a poem that I ...

Hey! Welcome to YWS! This was an emotional piece. I loved the words you used and how you placed them. I feel this tickle in my stomach Ticklish, yet soar ...

Ooh, I love this. I would totally sing this! Have you put it to music yet? Chorus: Because it's a long way back from "loving you," And it's a lonely ...

Wow-o-wow.! Your writings are amazing! I went to go read your first and second installment and couldn't stop saying wow. These are so descriptive! There were no mistakes from what ...

Very vivid and emotional. Loved this! That’s when the tears start. Setting my cheeks a fire because I’m so embarrassed. They're streaming down my pale cheeks, onto my lips, my ...

This was an okay poem....You need a little bit more emotion and descriptions in this poem. It doesn't really catch a person's eye. Make it more interesting. I like the ...

Wow, very nice poem. It was so moving. I loved it! The wind is so cold out by the river; the air has turned an indifferent grey. Clouds shed soft ...

Wow...I didn't know that there weren't that many options for us young writers. I'm glad that we have to help us improve our writing and get constructive critism. This is ...

Much better chapter! Yay, you're now explaining the title of the story!!! The first day of our 'relationship' was perfect. Absolutely, incredibly, 100% Please spell this out. It makes it ...

Good job for your second poem! They are gone forever, Ripped from my life with one tear. Sleeping in heaven without a care. Tear and care don't rhyme. Try a ...

Very nice poem, indeed. Love the rhyming and rythm. I, too, love shoter poems, and this was fabulous. You placed all the commas in the right places. I applaud you ...

Very dramatic poem! I loved the way you wrote a picture. This was very descriptive and detailed. Terror rolled towards us I agree with elephantwalrus that there is no towards. ...

My critique isn't going to help very much either. I loved this! Your rhyming rocks! This is such a short and sweet poem. This poem was very entertaining and captured ...

Well, first of all let me say, it was okay. I just think this is a typical teen romance. This first chapter didn't really capture my attention. Try some other ...

Aha, great chapter! I love the Star Wars movies! I feel like a total nerd when I talk about the movies too... :oops: After all, approaching him that day was ...