smorgishborg

I'm not sure what kind of competition you'll have, but this might make several cuts. It was a fairly strong poem, but was weighed down by the first stanza, which ...

TheHangman by Maurice Ogden Eh, it didn't do it for me. There was nothing that really stood out- it just wasn't compelling in the way it needs to be. You ...

In my book, people who make revisions deserve critiques the most of all. I know my words are going to good use. Judging by everyone else's reviews, it seems that ...

No need to be harsh, you've got a good deal to work with here. in general I appreciated your subject matter and tone. The idea wasn't very clichéd, and you ...

I thought you had forgotten! Well done, once again... It really helps to read the play as you watch though, you do get all the lines. The other unfortunate thing ...

Here's what really bugs me. "I wrote this when I was bored, my first attempt at Sci-Fi". What are your trying to accomplish with a subtitle like that? Why post ...

Really fascinating story, I loved the bit of history at the beginning, but the story was even better... Solid story telling from the opening line which had a certain poetry ...

Indeed questions arise! I question your haphazard use of exclamation points! See, I'm disappointed by this poem, because you seem incapable of going deep at all into the deepest subject ...

While there's nothing strictly wrong with it, it doesn't score very high in the originality and "profound observation" departments. - I think for a poem which is written to be ...

Its a solid script, and errors didn't impede comprehension so I'm going to ignore them. Dialogue : It makes me happy that your school teaches scriptwriting! I think they're doing ...

He closes the door silently and leans back on it, looking [s]passed[/s] past the camera at something inside the room. Very nice, you have a lovely image in your mind ...

Too short. Police interrogation scenes are fantastic fodder for good drama (see: The Pillowman) and this one is too quick. It's a very blunt, very bare Q & A session. ...

*head in hands* Check out the spoiler. [spoiler]Taking Care of the Grandkids All of this should be in italics. Character descriptions often go before the immediate setting. At Rise: Lights ...

Well, Cade, I'm not sure this would fit snugly in even the most expansive definition of "prose poetry". But obviously, there is such a thing... (And this *hint hint* is ...

Oh the angst! Well, I can't really talk, as I'm enjoying a lead role in an upcoming production myself.... :D But I digress. This script is cute, and not altogether ...