sezPez

If you were going for an eerie tone, you certainly achieved it. Even though the protagonist (is it a protagonist in a poem?) denies Lucifer, I thought that these lines ...

The tone of this piece is very pleasant and innocent. I can almost imagine that this was written by a five-year-old learning about everything for the first time (not that ...

I very much like the premise of this poem...I think comparing the heart to sand is apt because, as you say, it can be as soft as sand or hardened ...

I liked the first half of the poem a lot since it seems to reflect what I suppose a psychopath might think like. The central theme you were aiming for ...

Hmm...what I'm getting from this is that the bats represent the excitement and confusion of junior high romance, and that it's written in retrospect from when you find your muse. ...

The rhythm irked me a little, especially since the second and third stanzas were verbose compared to the first one. Try adjusting your sentence lengths and the beat of the ...

At times it seemed to drag on a little with the "well the night is better than day because etc.", between the 2nd and 3rd stanzas. The flow and rhythm ...

Some tiny grammar mistakes: I want to create different worlds, tell peoples stories. Peoples should have an apostrophe right after it. With them, a sea can spit it's green foam, ...

Really liked these two lines: My heart says no, While my heart says yes. Overall, it is good, albeit a little cliche. Also as the others have said before me, ...

I have to agree with snoink. As disturbing and sick rape is, the rhymes just somehow fail to convey that emotion to me. It seemed like: 1. dude rapes girl ...

Your metaphor of friendship as a tree is very true. Sad your friend left :( The poem itself was well written; however, it seems to be in like a prose-type ...

A decent poem, if not a bit repetitive with the "I'll just disappear because nobody cares" sort of thing. One line did irk me quite a bit: Maybe, 
But why ...

Mmm, do not worry, I only have 2 heads and 3 arms, only 1 of each bite :P Well, since I have some time I will shred this to shreds ...

Personally, I don't think it should take a massive striking fear of "Armageddon will come sooner if you don't conserve energy!" to make people do that, everyone should so it ...

The first four lines were okay; they described well and had a good feeling. However, I really would've liked it more if it was longer, because you just suddenly end ...