perdido

thanks,

well, they can't all be reviews

there are threads, you have to find them. as always, I enjoy your honesty.

re: Benway so let me get this straight you're drinking something that you are drinking to. like buying around a whiskey for all your friends and raising your glass and ...

luckless because its a reference to a science fiction novel by Larry Niven in which a couple of dudes are in a floating mansion trying to locate a woman who ...

okay that above was me being a poet and editing, this is me being a reader and interpreting, sometimes I like to boil things down to their elements and see ...

oh sorry I didn't realize you were too good for my criticisms. I'm giving you honest criticism from my experience as a writer, a consultant, an editor, and a student. ...

okay I'm going to edit out the sarcasm and give it to you straight: It's all on your other story so look there.

the can is for gas even if it was beer, I can have my characters do things that are illegal if I want! the car is actually a robot, you ...

thanks very much. the one thing I will comment on right now is that the extended metaphors you talked about are completely intentional and it is my intention to plague ...

Thanks, friends. This chapter needs a lot of work, I guess I wanted May and Tony to hang out with some people that didn't know them so as to maybe ...

smaller sections still? each part is a page, each chapter is about 4 / 5 pages. Compared to yr average novel, that's almost nothing. I'm new at formatting on this ...

Tony opened up to her because he's incredibly lonely and she's the closest thing to a friend he's got? And he went with her because he didn't see any other ...

Rach: I want you to read chapter 3 and 4 and then tell me what you think about Vincent. I think things will be more clear then? If they still ...

being vague is okay if you want to be vague. I'd say the main problem with this piece is not so much what it is missing, but what it has. ...