lydia9

Hi, Jessie! First of all, well done! Though your poem is short, it is still very powerful. I definitely understand thoroughly the point you are trying to make. You chose ...

Hi, ShadowVyper! Lydia here :3 I think the fact that Ryker acts dumb at first adds a lot to the depth of the story. It definitely made me like the ...

Hey, AMDDOG! At first glance, I think this prologue seems short so I think it might be unrealistic to hope to grab the reader in without a longer beginning. First ...

Hi, Holysocks! Nice user, by the way :) The first paragraph really drew me in, the first sentence, even. When I realized that it was the speaker who had died, ...

Hi RachelLeeAnn, I love the imagery in the first two lines. Those lines immediately created a festive mood. Also, the word "excuse" in the sixth line is a good choice ...

Hey Tay01, I like the overall theme of the poem, and you do a good job of making it clear. Typically, I recommend avoiding the word "just." It tends to ...

Hi, GSLeigh! This poem was very emotional and moving. I loved it! I couldn't relate to it personally, but I could still feel/connect to the speaker's emotions through your writing. ...

Hi, hazelophelia! In the second line, I would start with "That" instead of "How" to continue from "I'm sorry…" In the third, I would say, "I'm sorry for" instead of ...

Hey, Sceptre! The premise grabbed me right away. I find dreams fascinating. Some phrases seem like you are trying to word them elegantly, but they don't really make much sense. ...