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koinoyokan

  • Poetry » Realistic, General Re: Amsterdam, after the show

    I really liked how much this poem jumped around. The flow between the lines was constantly being broken and makes the narrative of the scene your telling feel equally inconsistent ...

    Thu Aug 06, 2020 6:36 pm
  • Poetry » Horror, Politics Re: "it's a good tub"

    Hey MageBird! Let me just say I really enjoyed this poem, horror, and more grotesque imagery is my cup of tea. After reading the prompt set by Arcticus I find ...

    Sat Aug 01, 2020 6:00 pm
  • Other » General, General Re: The Invisible Prince

    Hi Fortis, I really liked how you blended mediums in this piece which added to the overall ambiguous nature of the piece. Moving from poem to what reads as written ...

    Sat Aug 01, 2020 4:10 pm
  • Poetry » Dramatic, Health Re: ​Human Nature

    Hi Ladygemstone! I'm really liking the imagery in some of these lines. IDK why but it gives me the impression of someone having a weight tied to their leg and ...

    Mon Apr 27, 2020 1:20 am
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Vision

    k. so I'm keeping my promise so you should be mildly happy at that. got to say I'm impressed with this poem. 1 because I have zero ability to write ...

    Thu Apr 16, 2020 3:29 am
  • Novel / Chapter » Historical Fiction, Action / Adventure Re: Chapter Two, Trouble

    Ok so I haven't read the first chapter of your novel so I'll focus on editing mostly. But first I think this is a good action scene. From your description ...

    Sun Apr 05, 2020 1:30 am
  • Novel / Chapter » Teen Fiction, General Re: My Story... P.2

    Ok, so that was heavy. I have a lot of thoughts and emotions going through my head right now so I'm not really sure how to start. I know you ...

    Sun Apr 05, 2020 1:15 am
  • Art » Dramatic, Spiritual Re: Speaking freely... except not so much... even the title was edited 80 times.. oh my goodness even the title is too long now...

    Hey Shusher I really like the lightness of this poem. I find that poetry has the ability to convey emotion but many writers tend to forget that this means the ...

    Sat Apr 04, 2020 7:32 pm
  • Poetry » General, General Re: for my father

    Hi Lavvie, I just wanted to leave a review to say wow. You really have a good understanding of poetry and how to bend words for your own use. I ...

    Sat Apr 04, 2020 5:26 pm
  • Short Story » Spiritual, Dramatic Re: Relative Distance

    This was really refreshing to read I often find that works including couples can fall off the deep end when it comes to romance and leaves the rest of the ...

    Thu Apr 02, 2020 11:44 pm
  • Novel / Chapter » Fanfiction, Science Fiction Re: Lets go

    First, off I just have to say I am impressed with your writing considering the fact I am not super familiar with the franchise of star wars I was still ...

    Thu Apr 02, 2020 11:15 pm
  • Script » Horror, Film Re: From the Bench to the Beach

    I really like the narrative and scene-building you are doing here. There are so many ways you could build this into a longer scene and or story. As this is ...

    Thu Apr 02, 2020 10:55 pm
  • Short Story » Realistic, Dramatic Re: Gertrude Paulsen's Last Wish

    I like the very strong plotline, you don't hesitate at all moving from one point to the next. Which is good for a short story. I feel like you sometimes ...

    Wed Apr 01, 2020 7:23 pm
  • Short Story » Mystery / Suspense, Dramatic Re: Lilies of the Valley

    This is a very good skeleton of a horror short. The journal entries type writing is always very helpful in this genre because you can get into the mind of ...

    Mon Mar 30, 2020 5:42 am
  • Novel / Chapter » General, Science Fiction Re: ...

    Ok so as this is just the beginning and you haven't given a plot summary yet, I can't say much about what has happened so far. You do a good ...

    Mon Mar 30, 2020 4:51 am


Live your life how you want, but don't confuse drama with happiness.
— Ron, Parks & Rec