kathryn

Okay, so this chapter just made the story more confusing. There needs to be more description of places and people and easier to follow interactions between the characters. I noticed ...

This was a rather confusing start to your story. It didn't flow very well but I think that it is very easy to fix that. The first thing is that ...

Hey! I'm back for the fourth part review! I'm going to list the grammar and spelling thing first before I go into the overall chapter. luke- Luke luckly- luckily thought- ...

This chapter was better as far as the description of how she feels. I like how you write that she will always be haunted by memories and then ended with ...

This is a good start to the story. There were a few things that I saw while reading that I wanted to mention. There were a few spelling mistakes that ...

This second part is good. There weren't any major errors that I could see. There was one paragraph where you forgot to capitalize the first letter. I like your descriptions ...

This is a good start to the story. I like how you introduce us into the story and kind of tell us where she is before you just throw us ...

This was another good chapter. There are still a few grammar and spelling errors and some sentences where you were just missing words. "Everywhere were..." - "There were ruffians and ...

This is an interesting story. I like how it's written from the point of view of magic and how magic is like a person as opposed to just being something ...

This chapter was a lot better as far as me knowing the tenses and all of that. There were still quite a few grammar and punctuation things but not a ...

This chapter was still confusing and some of the sentences I didn't really know what corrections to give because I was so mixed up reading them so I'll just tell ...

This is an interesting story but it doesn't flow very well. It doesn't have the right sentence structure to really keep a reader hooked but that is something that is ...

You did a lot better this time around with distinguishing whether it was in the past or the present and it definitely flowed a lot better. There were still a ...

This story was a bit confusing to me because I couldn't tell whether it was past or present. Make sure to distinguish that so that the story flows better. There ...

This is an interesting way to start off the book. It's a good way to get the reader thinking about what is going on and it gives a little insight ...