A Chance to Fly, A Chance to Fall ~Chapter One

I stare out the car window, watching as the rain smacked across it. I glance at Jane, who is awkwardly smiling at me as we pull into the Glen Cove high school parking lot. “Today is your big day, Max. The day you start fresh!” She says, gleaming over at me from the driver's seat. “Whatever,” I mumble irritably, and push open the car door, slamming it shut and racing to the shelter of the school building. I’d had hydrophobia ever since I was younger and hated anything to do with water.

When I got to the front doors, I paused, almost unsure if I should go in or not. I mentally scolded myself for being such a scaredy cat, then walk through the doors. Immediately, I count my exits. I head to my locker, my head down and hood up so people won't notice me. Most of them don't, though a few ask my name. I simply shoulder my way past them, ignoring them completely. If they don't know you, they can't hurt you, I quietly remind myself as I trudge through the crowded hallways.

Finally, after making it through a maze of hallways, I find my locker. A boy, tall and clearly athletic looks down upon me. He has bleach blonde hair and crystal blue eyes, however, I am not swayed by his appearance. Looks can be deceiving, and they only lead to abandonment. Still yet, I catch him staring at me. “What the heck do you want?” I snarl at him, though he simply smiles.

“I want to know your name. I haven’t seen you here before.”

“Too bad. Now get out of my way before I snap your neck!" 

“Okay. Fine. But before I leave, my name is Joey. It was nice meeting you.” He flashes yet another smile, then turns and walks away. I roll my eyes, muttering to myself. Some people just can't take a hint.

I arrive to my homeroom just as the bell rings and find an empty seat in the very back of the classroom. The teacher struts proudly into the classroom and surveys the room. “Hello children. I expect that you all have begun working on your English assignment.” Her eyes fall on me, and a flicker of interest lights her eyes.“You are new to this school, correct miss Rhyne?”

“Yes?”

“Very well. I’ll make sure you have everything you need. In the meantime, Hazel, you will make sure that Maximum knows her way around.” I glanced over at a beautiful girl with short black hair and green eyes. I immediately took a liking to her, considering she was wearing a shirt that advertised Panic! At The Disco.

I turn back to the Ms. Cooke and nod, “Um, actually, it’s just Max.” I glance once more at Hazel, catching her eye. She seems almost annoyed, which bothers me for an odd reason. How is it that I can annoy people without even saying a word? I don't know. I look back down at my desk, refusing to look at her for the rest of class. There's no point in wasting my time with haters. When the bell rings, I grab my things and turn to leave.

“Hey, new kid, get back here! I’m supposed to show you around and I don't appreciate you leaving me like that.” Hazel grabs my arm and I stop, turning and looking her in the eyes.

“Whatever… Just don't touch me.” I mumble, pulling my arm away from her.

“Fine. What class do you have next?” She asks and I look down at my schedule.

“Mrs. Rowan.” I reply as she begins to lead me down the crowded hallway.

“That sucks. I she's the meanest teacher in the school. Rumor has it she once threw a ruler at some kid for back talking. Hey, at least we both have her. That makes things a little bit easier, I guess.” She just keeps on talking the whole way to class, not caring that I rarely say a word. And when we arrive at Mrs. Rowan's class, she sits next to me in the back of the class. Already I can tell I am fond of her, though I’d never admit it. Besides, making friends is stupid. I just can't afford to trust anyone anymore.

I decide to pay a bit of attention to this teacher, considering she’s supposedly the school's meanest teacher. Again, she lectures me on her rules and expectations. Every now and then, I glance over at Hazel. She catches my gaze each time, and I look away, embarrassed to find myself mindlessly staring at her. It’s quite stupid, actually. So stupid, in fact, that I literally slap myself in the middle of class. A couple of kids sitting nearby give me a weird look, and I scowl at them. Just because I seem mental doesn't mean anything. I can bet I'm ten times smarter than those idiots will ever be.

At last, the bell rings. I grab my things, but rather than walking off, I wait for Hazel. She stares into my eyes for a moment, almost as if searching them for something, then tilts her head to the side. “Why were you staring at me?” She asks as we walk down the hall together. “Because,” I reply, purposely avoiding the question. I’m honestly not even sure why I was staring at her. I just was. “Well, just stop it. Its weird.¨

As it turns out, we end up with every class together excepting science, because she's a nerd and ended up taking a higher course. I’m glad to have her companionship, though refuse to let it be anymore than that. I can't have friends. They will only hurt me.

I make it through the day slowly, like a turtle stuck in some peanut butter. I can't say it was particularly good, nor was it bad. It was just another day. Another day of just crawling through life.

I head out to the parking lot and cross over to where Jane sits in her truck. I climb into the passenger side and sigh. Jane stares at me expectantly, “So, how was your day?” She asks, and I turn away from her. “Fine.” For once, she takes a hint and leaves me alone. The rest of the drive home nobody speaks. We sit in silence, listening to the honking of horns as we get stuck in afternoon traffic.

When we arrive at home I dash up the stairs and into my new room. I throw my book bag down and plop myself down on the bed, exhausted. I stare up at the ceiling, unsure of what to think about everything that's been happening. So much happened so fast… It feels as though just yesterday I was with my mother, and yet here I am, free at last. This life feels so surreal. As if I am living in a fairytale, given the happy ending desired.

Yet what some people don't realize is that even though an ending is happy, those memories will haunt you forever. The second I close my eyes, I see her again. The hatred burning in her eyes as she screamed at me. The hunger I felt as I would go days without eating, simply because I wasn't allowed to. The pain of every single word she said, and the way it cut through me worse than any knife ever had.

But it’s over… I tell myself. It’s over, and I’m okay now. Now all I have to do is make it through this stupid life.

“What doesn't kill you makes you tougher.” My brother had once told me, holding me in his arms while I cried.

“Don't you mean stronger?” I had asked, though he shook his head and smiled.

“No, I invented that saying. People just stole it from me. Now, if anyone dares to hurt you again, just tell them your big brother will come and beat the living crap out of them.” I smiled up at him adoringly, wiping the tears from my eyes and hugging him as tight as I could.“Oh, are we doing bear hugs now?” He laughed, and hugged me so hard I couldn’t breath and my back made a funny popping sound. When he let me go, we both laughed and went to go play xbox.

I smile at the fond memory, tears forming in my eyes as I remember him. I haven’t seen him since December, 2012, two days after Christmas morning. Mother had gotten rid of him, leaving him at a hospital for someone else to worry about. I’m not so sure where he is now, but I know that he’s thriving wherever he is. He always was a fighter, despite everything that went on in that Hell of a household. He used to always make me laugh and smile, finding ways to make life better. Someday, I wish to be just like him.