illy7896

I love the way you have added more description within your story, and have started to introduce important characters, and I can already identify certain friendships bound to be made ...

I liked this piece, that sense that he didn't understand why he went towards this room in a way is the foreshadowing of an adventure which is a really cool ...

I loved the detail you put into this, it's so descriptive and personal and you make personal opinions with each of the characters which was really effective. I love the ...

I really love this poem because I can really relate to that feeling when your mind drifts from what you're doing. I loved the line 'incomplete derivations' since it implies ...

This is quite a humorous piece of work, that I found quite controversial but very good. I like that this is a more observational piece, without dialogue or anything but ...

This is a very interesting piece of work, and I like the way that you have given descriptions of Blexibis through sentences and his actions. You have given good details ...

I love both poems, especially the second one because it addresses poverty, greed and hunger in a very light-hearted way. I loved the line 'normally, humans are used to ignoring ...

I like the concept of introducing her to a new school- but perhaps you can introduce certain characters or scenes to foreshadow something bad happening. Or to foreshadow a friendship ...

This is so beautiful, so poetic. It's a reflection on human life, being and then unbeing. And we ask ourselves why all of this. It really creates this loneliness and ...

This was so cute, I loved your scene description and I thought that you managed to describe the scene well with a casual and understandable outlook. I like the line ...

I really liked your entry, I haven't read any pieces that belong to this story but I was able to understand the basics of what was happening because of the ...

I love the last line 'think twice before being decisive' because I think its a pretty cool contrast between decisiveness and indecisiveness. It shows that even though sometimes you think ...

I love the idea that she is an heir to a kingdom and an ordinary girl. I'm interested to see her connections to the kingdom and the storyline and the ...

I liked the dialogue in chapter 3, replicating what school children would most likely say. I also like the fact that you have voiced her feelings through dialogue with her ...

I thought that this was quite an interesting piece, with interesting characters and stories. I enjoyed the fact that you introduced the town as being having floods, which creates the ...