dragonfphoenix

Knight Dragon, here to review! Welcome to YWS! (Where are all these tech essay people coming from???) Anyway... Technical: "This is a quotation by Singer (2010) that talks about internet ...

Knight Dragon, here to review. Welcome to YWS! Another tech essayist. Well, let's begin, shall we? Technical: "But we are not aware when it came from." should be "not aware ...

Knight Dragon, here to review. I'm going to say this for pretty much all the tech essays. This is obviously a class or group of students of some sorts that ...

Knight Dragon, here to review! [Quick note on your utopia/dystopia comment: in my opinion, there's no such thing as a "dystopia" in the sense that George Orwell speaks when he ...

Knight Dragon, here to review! So, Iambic Pentameter, huh? Well, let's see how you did. ... Hmm, well, the only word that didn't fit into the pattern was "imaginations". Now, ...

Knight Dragon (hehehe, that name sounds familiar) here to review! Technical: "Lady Ariana pulled a canteen out of here saddlebag and took a small gulp of water from it." "here" ...

Knight Dragon, here to review! Technical: "I can feel the storm brewing. The electricity dancing in the air," I feel like you should have the punctuation for these two lines ...

Knight Dragon, here to review! First off, welcome to YWS! Second, this needs to be shorter. Go review other works (the Green Room isn't the only place to review things; ...

Knight Dragon, here to help with the technical! First thing: your title. That should be centered over the poem, with one line in between it and the first stanza. That ...

Knight Dragon, here to review! So, the biggest thing I noticed right off the bat was punctuation, or the lack of it. Example: "What day is it When two colors ...

Knight Dragon, here to review! Technical: "Those nights I had dreams of crows flying out of my old black hair, a massive eyes watching me then my eyes would bleed ...

Knight Dragon, here to review! All right, technical first: Well, with the sentence structure of this poem, it's really hard for me to say where there shouldn't be commas and ...

Knight Dragon, here to review! So, I haven't read any of the other adventures, but since this is the first of a new season I'm going to at least make ...

Knight Dragon, here to review! Technical: "Each ounce, hauling me down, wearing me thin." I felt like that first comma was unnecessary, and broke the reading flow where it shouldn't ...

Knight Dragon, here to review! Technical first: I felt that all of these needed to be sentences, instead of commas after some of them. You're making these short, simple statements, ...