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Re: Family First
Very nice. I enjoy the uniqueness you put into this poem. Dogs here with a couple little critiques. Firstly, this is just me which makes this a little bias..., personally ...
Mar 30, 2011 -
Re: Admitting Depression
Heyyyy dogs here. In my opinion i was always a fan of short poetry, although most people i meet don't like it that much so its always nice to see ...
Mar 28, 2011 -
Re: Small to Me.
Hey Frazol, dogs here just giving a couple small pointers. Firstly i really enjoy this poem. It has a simple plot and idea and you convey it well threw your ...
Mar 28, 2011 -
Re: You And I
Hehe catchy. I like it. Dogs here just throwing out a few pointers. it flows very nicely but actuly i really dont think it should be in lytic poetry. I ...
Mar 28, 2011 -
Re: Rain
OOOOOOOO i like! Hey Dogs here just giving your poem a little tiny pointers cause there is really very little wrong here. that is her heart, i mean - her ...
Mar 28, 2011 -
Re: You
Hey dogs here! firstly i love your poem! i really do enjoy reading it, a simple achievable goal that seems just out of reach. Now i do, however, have some ...
Mar 28, 2011 -
Re: Death by Chess June 23, 2091
Hiya dogs here. First of all I like it so far. Its a good starter but I think that maybe you should "beef" this chapter up. Personally what I enjoy ...
May 27, 2010 -
Re: Amusement Caught the Eye
Okay quick things. Dogs here and the "How did i do it" kinda unncesiary. But anyways this sounds nice and i think it actully belongs in novels not short stories.... ...
May 24, 2010 -
Re: One Tree in the Forest (Prologue)
Allrighty Dogs here. Well so far this is looking nice. Im a big fan of your other book you've written on YWS. But I can't really pass too much judgment ...
May 24, 2010 -
Re: Faeries- no title thus far!
Okey dokey Dogs here and i just wanted to do the honors of being your first critic on YWS. Also there is a 2:1 ratio in which you must review ...
May 24, 2010 -
Re: new story - no title
Whoa nizice! Dogs here and I really enjoyed your story. It has an incredibly strong beginning and my favorite style of a prologue. I also liked the discription of some ...
May 23, 2010 -
Re: In my mind.
Hiya dogs here Okey dokey down to business. First of all this is a great POEM. I believe this should actully go in Lytic poetry opposed to short stories because ...
May 23, 2010 -
Re: Zombies Want My Brain, part 1
Hiya dogs here. Okey dokey you got some dang good writing I'll give you that. The plot line is solid and it seems like a very concrete idea... however, being ...
May 23, 2010 -
Re: Field Trip
GO PERRY HES BY FAR MY FAVORITE CHARACTER! But down to business. Yes those commas. There dangerous they are watch out for them. The story line/plot line seems a little ...
May 23, 2010 -
Re: Pass the Note
Okey Dokey Dogs here. A couple quick things about this. 1 this is poetry not a song. 2 having a chorus right after anouther chorus dosnt work so well. The ...
May 23, 2010
