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  • Poetry » Narrative, General Re: Death of a Fairy

    This was long, but it didn't bother me. The problem was you don't keep the seriousness of a poem like this. It didn't bore me. But when you took away ...

    May 11, 2008
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Dawn and Dusk

    Adna, I'm afraid I missed what this was about, but what I read though unclear and a little abstract. I very much like. It's got beauty in those lines, best ...

    May 11, 2008
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Snow Falls

    With the falling of the snow comes silent blanket of white powder that brings a certain joy. Snow flakes land in my hand only to melt away. The free falling ...

    May 11, 2008
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Love...

    One question: "Why?" You tell us how love is, but that's nothing new to use, tell us why? Don't just keep on saying how it is without showing why it's ...

    May 11, 2008
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: My Desert Rose

    Very well... it's all good and well telling us this, but how does she make ya feel? How do ya feel when near her. Telling us everything, bores us, as ...

    May 11, 2008
  • Short Story » General, General Re: Yes, Little Rock

    Creepy, and shocked me. I never expected the brother to do it. And way he seems at first he seems a totally differenet person to after here: “Hey, Alana, you ...

    May 10, 2008
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: lies

    It's very different, don't agree with lies being like Spiders, as I love them, but it's from ya mind so won't be too nit picky about it. Now on second ...

    May 10, 2008
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Purple

    I agree with Brad, this is angst and doesn't really make me feel anything. Sounds very emo-ish and poor me. You do try and at least approach it differently, but ...

    May 10, 2008
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Fear

    Something is knocking the window - it's just a branch missing its tree. Somewhere a light flashes - it's just a car missing its map reader. Something lurks under the ...

    May 10, 2008
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: dedicated to someones specials

    when you lose someone close to you heart and you whole world falls apart you cant carry on but you must be strong cause pple depend on you tears fall ...

    May 9, 2008
  • Short Story » Fantasy, General Re: The Accursed Cartographer

    This is (probably) a novel not in chapters. I'm not used to writing for an audience, but that is what this piece is intended for - an audience. I usually ...

    May 9, 2008
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Stare At The Road.

    Very interesting, some of the spacing bit weird like this: I laugh, And smile. Oh no. Here comes another. Attack. See it's not right spaced out. Other than that, can't ...

    May 9, 2008
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Rain

    Fix colour, fix puntuation and then pm me to reread it also from what I noticed you spoke once in chat speak. The people pass w/out a care And suddenly, ...

    May 9, 2008
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Because I'm Gangsta!

    This type of poem is very poor and mainstream version of it. It personally sounds more like a song and it just drones on and on. I got bored after ...

    May 9, 2008
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Them

    Hmm, sorry to be harsh but 'so!' we all know this. We want to be interested not read some contrived poem about the problems of the world, unless you write ...

    May 9, 2008


I write because I don't know what I think until I read what I say.
— Flannery O'Connor