Wolf

Hey Andy! Man, I should have reviewed this long ago. I've been meaning to critique something of yours for ages, but everything in your portfolio already had, like, a gazillion ...

Hi there, OverEasy. :) The first thing I noticed was that this chapter is very short. Dangerously short. I know that some novels (in you are indeed hoping to publish ...

Oh, phooey. Everyone's already reviewed...:/ Still - even though all the mistakes have been pointed out, why don't I say what I liked and why? It probably won't be very ...

Warm blood on cold skin. A kunai driven deep into an opponent’s chest. The hoot of an owl. And a full moon. I also often use the technique of listing ...

TheForgottenAuthor -- This is good, in a simple kind of way. You rhyme well and the grammar is good, but it isn't my kind of poetry. I like poems that ...

kinzygirl223 -- This is okay. The grammatical/sentence structuring errors kind of ruin it; I bet it would be better than 'okay' if you fixed those up. There are some other ...

First off, this is WAY too short. It isn't a haiku, so there's no justification for the length - or lack of - and I think it ended too abruptly. ...

Echo to Suzanne on everything she said - talk normally, and read more poetry. (And I think its 'Amelia' not 'Amilia' but I don't know.) Anyways. This is lacking in ...

Echo to Floydian up there. This definitely needs more imagery, and it is kind of navel-gazing. There's no feeling in it - you are just repeating and listing things like ...

There should be a forum entitled, 'Cliched poetry' or 'Navel-Gazing'. The poor 'Lyric poetry' forum is clogged with poems about unrequited love and vampires. Hmm... nothing really stuck out for ...

Sureal already pointed out the nit-picky things, but here are my opinions/advice: Spacing: Please, organize this into paragraphs. Emotion: This piece has no emotion in it - I assume that ...

Hey Derek! Sota was sitting on his bed studying. This is a rathe anemic opening line. -_- I agree with Errant that you should never start with the main character's ...

*shaming the name of SPEW, sorry * SPEW? What's that? Any ways. This is really short - nothing to critique - but it does seem interesting. You should definitely continue ...

Yeah, ditto. The first two lines are really cliched, but the rhyming is very good. The only thing that bothered me was that you seem to have written this poem ...

arch angel -- This is your, what, fourth submission today? Please, no more than one per day or else you shall suffer the wrath of the mods. Heck, I shouldn't ...