Velvet.whispers

Dear mikeypro, This is, well very, Beckett! The language is simple and superficial, but the building up of the flow hints at something greater and more absurd, and more beautiful. ...

Dear Writer, what a quaint sonnet! I feel like you can do better than this though. Actually was curious because I once had to write an essay on what is ...

Dear SmylinG, I see you have just reviewed mine as I was about to do this, funnily enough I'm going to make the opposite commentary, this piece looks like too ...

I agree with Miracles, I think this is short, bittersweet and holds the swell of beautiful ambition, flowing like tides of the sea. I love the concept and the rhythm ...

Dear Tanith, I like this, a lot, It's one of the most original pieces I've read here. Your rhythm is wonderful, and the repetition is brilliantly carried out! Well done! ...

This is beautiful and reminds me I should go to bed! Well done! It should be while we were in a slumber grammatically speaking but there's nothing wrong with taking ...

Hey, welcome to YWS! First we have a rule here, You need to do two reviews for each new item you post! This ensures that everyone gets reviews and the ...

Ok, I'll go through this line by line "I'm slowly falling adrift" Falling and adrift kind of contradict themselves, is that intentional? I also don't think you need slowly plus ...

This is nice, if a bit too long and self conscious in my opinion, but that's just me. This sound like stupid advice, but try and listen to the words, ...

Woah, this totally blew me away, I love the prose poetry, even though the rhymes can be a bit artificial, don't get locked in to your rhyme scheme or meter, ...

Heya this is pretty good, just a few pineckity details : You're using past tense, so stay in it = your dislike crippled my wrist , not "cripples". Try and ...

Hi, I'm velvet, nice to meet you. I was struck by this piece, because I remember something similar happening to me, a girls thing at school, bitchy and catyness. I ...

Hey! This is amazing. I'm not even supposed to be on YWS (stupid exams) but this just caught my eye. I love it, it's so mysterious. Sorry i haven't got ...

Hey! So, a review for a review eh? I guess this is a beguinning of a story then... I'm going to start with the bad. a) it's terribly cliché, we've ...