ToritheMonster

Hey, Dreamy here, as promised. Alright, I agree with Lydia. This needs some proof-reading. You have tons of errors that can easily be caught. Here we go, my corrections in ...

Here I am, as promised. You asked for a harsh review... so here it goes, sort of. Alright. This entire thing was incredibly confusing. Even with your explanation in the ...

Hey, here I am as requested! Okay, you wanted a harsh review? Well, here goes. It's cheap, and doesn't have an amp, but it's the thought that counts. This doesn't ...

Alrighty, I'm ba-ack!Let's get right to it, you know the drill. :smt016 King Jairon sat in his study, poring over reports. The room was one of the most lavish in ...

Hey! Alright, Kanen caught most of the problems I had with this... and this was pretty well written anyway. Just make sure you use question marks where they're needed. You ...

Hey there! Here I am, as corrections/comments are in reddish pink, and an asterisk means I took something out. The Assassin’s Redemption Chapter 1 Dracon rocked back on his heels ...

Wow, I really loved this! It really did have a "chant" rhythm to it, almost like a song. My nitpicks: The boat- just float we’re almost there. after "float" add ...

Hey! I liked this poem. Your style of repetition was cute, though if the poem had gone on I would have gotten really captured how someone who is engaged to ...

Hey! First off, welcome to YWS. Next: a bit of a reality check. This poem made very little sense. For example: "From the things that were less stark." "Stark" makes ...

Hey there! Dreamy here. Let's get right down to it, my corrections in reddish pink: I call for you in the morning light, whispers fill my ears. The shadows cast ...

Hey! I think everyone else took all my nitpicks, so I'll just stick to the positives. I really liked your poem! It was cute, and simple yet meaningful. I like ...

HI! I really liked this poem, it showed lots of emotion, but not outwardly. Make sure you take everyone else's nitpicks, and then this will be awesome! It's a nice ...

Hi! Okay, the first thing I thought when I read this was: "Oh my goodness! Another person who loves marmalade as much as I do!!!! So I, as a fellow ...

Hey,I'm Dreamy, and I'll be your reviewer today. First off, I'd just like to say that this is one of the best short stories I've read in quite a while. ...

Hi! I liked this, it was a nice little read. Here's my review, my corrections in reddish pink: Not a single thing on the earth Can compare to the evening ...