Tamora

This is wonderful! I love it! there are just a few little things that I thought i'd point out. One is the fact the paragraphs. i like long paragraphs, but ...

I really enjoyed this although I agree wihth alot of what Suzanne said, the repetition got a bit weary and the ending wasn't strong enough. But the metaphors were great! ...

I really, really like this. don't be disgusted! there are some good moments in this, and the clicheiness makes it fun to read and interesting. I like this alot. You've ...

the half heart is affective, but apart from that, i didn't really like it, no offense. You need some more metaphors or interesting sentences. The ideas however are good, i ...

*sniff* This is so sad! I know what exactly what you mean. It's so pointless! There're only a couple of things that need changing, and they're mainly small things. I ...

This is really quite a good start, and introduces what I'm guessing is going to be the main plotline for the story well. there ae a few things though that ...

This is an interesting idea, and well executed. I like it! The other two have picked out the grammar and speeling things, so I'll cut straight to the story line ...

I realsie that it isn't poetry as the others have pointed out, but I'll still crit it, as I think it's worth it. This actually has some nice moments in ...

I'm going to look at this as a teacher would, or at least, I'll try to. lol, I don't how I'll succeed. They were tiny mirrors that fell, cracked, and ...

This is really good! I like the ideas that you've brought to light, and the way you've incorporated them all into the simple act of eating an apple. Very inventive. ...

I love Monty Python!! I realise that you're not the same as the greats, so this is really not bad. the Black Knight was difinitely my favourite part of the ...

OMG!!! Daniel died! That's horrible! And so sad! I was hoping that she'd stop him or something, but this is really interesting. Your first sentence really sets the scene. First ...

I never saw it before you changed it, but what it is now is great! It seems that before it would have been quite jaggered to read, but now it ...

I love it, I take it you're a fan of James Blunt as well as HP! Me too! This is a good take on the song, it really works well, ...

This is good! :D Nice work, there're aren't too many things to pick up on, just the odd speling or typo, but nothing too major. Blided by your lies *blinded* ...