Sohini

The last stanza looks out-of-place. The "joke" bit I mean... And..."rhyme" and "time" are very cliched rhymes. I liked the first stanza a lot, maybe you could write a different ...

That's a very cute poem. Er...one thing's bugging me though... My mouth won’t close Sure it shouldn't be "open"?? Cuz if you don't keep your mouth close, it'll be open ...

This poem has potential but needs a lot of work on it. The very first stanza: (note you missed the apostrophe in don't) A feeling inside me swirls, Making me ...

I'm afraid, I find this poem a bit too haphazard. You already have said it and it's true--it is in the raw state. Love is like hate I think this ...

Hmm...serious stuff but it confused me. Points I think that are to be noted: Putting them in plural will spoil the fun so you need to keep the words in ...

This is an enjoyable poem indeed. The title caught my interest and good going Oct Girl with circle!! You have a fresh style, very light-hearted yet appealing. It's a break ...

This is one of those poems which I want to illustrate. It's so light-hearted and simple but you have to smile when you read it. Already told, you need to ...

Point one, most of us cannot hate anything that has Edward Cullen in it. So, BD was something I liked for most bits, and found weird at the eeww bits. ...

Edward Cullen *faints* Edward Cullen *faints* He's just so cool! I think the Twilight series is very easy to read and feel. It's very fluid, like Ed's movements and perfect ...

This piece of writing has got potential. It says so much in so little words. Only, you might want to expand bits of it. Maybe, add some past memories of ...

A good read. Warm and fuzzy narration. I take pleasure in small paragraphs and you’ve put in many. And the dialogues were pleasantly flowing and very real. The part when ...

I see you're new here. Welcome and Well Done! Really nice poem and the rhymes are almost always very impressive. The style id odd because the various stanzas have various ...

A new approach to trees. In the sense that it's very modern and not the wise type we expect all old trees to be. I enjoyed the rhymes and the ...

Neat style! And there's nothing to complain about the lines breaking at odd places, it fits in very well. Really, I am impressed by the easy flow of the poems ...

Welcome to YWS. First poems are always special and you've done a grand job! Congratulations! The theme has been put in a novel way which keeps the reader focused and ...