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Re: The Purple Sphere "2
Someone asking me to review a piece? I'm flattered. Let's see then. Chapter Two Daniel and I were at the shopping centre. Yeah, all right I know, classic loser teenager ...
Jul 13, 2009 -
Re: The Purple Sphere
Hi there! I'll now do a magic trick! In this post, I shall give you an exact copy of your works, only mangled! :D Let's begin... Prologue The darkness chased ...
Jul 6, 2009 -
Re: Wolfskin, Bearhide
Hi there! Let's see whatcha got... Commenting in red! Now I understand this is an unfinished, under-development thing, but I'll be giving you points to give us more info on ...
Mar 2, 2009 -
Re: Loss, love, and life.
I thought this was extremely well written. The only thing I can get nitpicky about is that dividing the text a little may have made it even easier to read, ...
Jan 14, 2009 -
Re: Oh Society...
Hi! Gotta say, your piece left me with very mixed feelings. You use a lot of complicated words and obviously know how to produce elaborate writing, but I get the ...
Jan 12, 2009 -
Re: The Breathers - Prologue
I can tell its a good one from the fact that it captured my attention in the first sentence. My kind? What kind, I wanna know more... Result, read on. ...
Oct 2, 2008 -
Re: [deleted]
Around for centuries, this, yeah - Would think that we'd have come up with a method of raising our kids out of it by now, but nooo... Ah well. No ...
Oct 2, 2008 -
Re: The Storybook- Chapter Two
Ahh, the story(book) continues. Let me thee... Chapter Two Barkley was lying on her bed, sleeping. She laughed as she watched his legs twitch as if chasing something. S h ...
Jul 12, 2008 -
Re: Knighting a vampire:what havoc it can cause
Hullo! I saw this story lacked in-depth reviews, so I thought I'd come to the rescue! Hmmms.... Knighting a Vampire : What havoc it can cause News spread through the ...
Jul 11, 2008 -
Re: My brother's actually.
Hoo boy, that was very good. This is the kind of text that I try to achieve, with varying degrees of fail. Very well done thar. The nitpicky has mostly ...
Jul 10, 2008 -
Re: 'Coven Born' Prologue
Hi there jules4848! You asked for a review, so here I am! Let me thee... -Prologue: Withering Castle- Breathing softly I did my best to resist the temptation to sneeze. ...
Jul 10, 2008 -
Re: Removed by Author
Here we are again, me and the cloak ! Let's see whatcha got! 1 (pt 2) We landed somewhat more gracefully, this time into my bedroom. Tobias rapidly let go ...
Jul 9, 2008 -
Re: Removed by Author
Awh, nobody's requested me to review a piece before. I just couldn't refuse, so here you go. *Dons the red critique cloak once again* 1 The lightning lit the sky ...
Jul 9, 2008 -
Re: The Storybook Chapter One
Well done! Looks like a promising start thar. Right, a couple of thoughts! Your grammar is fine, in fact the only error I could spot was that your last sentence ...
Jul 8, 2008 -
Re: Eldest
Ok. I've read both books, and I thought they were okay. As in, not absolutely mind blowing. Why? Too many clichés. Dragonriders, dwarves in mountains, mysterious elves, a farmer boy ...
Jul 8, 2008
