Skellingtom

That is one mighty ugly wall of text. Please put in paragraphs so that it is readable. "It was midday already, and her belly was showing its impatience to little ...

I am not sure what the point of this is. It's just retelling the beginning of Genesis, without adding your own opinion or twist to it or message.

Like tribee91 said, this is a good start. It seems to me like you're going for a short poem, and that's what i think you should do with this idea, ...

I like it, though I don't think I understand the point you're trying to make. It invokes good, clear imagery. Maybe add a passage or a few more lines to ...

I like it. Despite the unfortunate formatting, it is good and held my interest the whole way through. You chose a good title that grabbed my attention, started slowly and ...

Interesting. It needs grammar, and maybe a little rework to make the purpose of the poem clearer. The description is good, but unclear in that t doesn't create an image ...