Shine

Try putting in some more stronger emotions into it.I would suggest rewriting this with a nice flow and make it more explanative. Keep writing!

A nice short message in it.sweet. Keep writing and most importantly posting them here!

I agree with cupcake that it doesn't end the way you think it will.Well that was fun. Keep posting!

Its hard to put such emotions into words.I would say its flawless.Good job Toe. And talking about the last stanza I think its nice enough but I wish this piece ...

Thank you for reading it.And also thanks for the suggestion.... :) ~Shine~

Thank you so much to all of you for reading my poem. :) Passion:I guess thats life. guitargrl1323:Thank you Ashton:Ok I wil edit it.:) yukidizon:Thank you sweetie. CJeanene13:hehe...this wasn't on ...

Good going.....the changes work perfectly.

A nice and short article on Friendship.Sets in perfectly in the magazine.And whatever yo u wrote is true enough. Keep Posting! :) ~Shine~

A nice plot again,the story is indeed interesting. Waiting for the next one.

You were good at writing this. Looking forward to the next chapter. So keep posting!

I simply loved the idea.Very well too no crit to give because its good the way it is.Even you worked out nicely with the rythm. Keep it up! ~Shine~

As I recieved a positive response on this poem,I got it printed in my school magazine.hehe...:)

Humorous I think!Cool!

Didn't really get the whole meaning out of it.

I liked the way you had put on the whole story,directly speaking i liked the story but as a lyrical poem i would give you a 5 on 10. But ...