Sam

I've never read anything Zane, but it got me pretty hooked anyway. :wink: Anyway... First off, try to avoid all caps in a story- especially if you're working on something ...

'And because I am the second of these eight children, and the oldest girl, I have certain responsibilities the younger kids don’t. For instance, each morning, one of my jobs ...

When I first saw this, I said to myself, "Oh, lovely, another dialogue-less, attempting-to-be-deep piece of crap that I'm going to have to force myself to read from here on ...

SNOINKUS!!!!!!! Guess what is the major problem with Emily? There are no problems! THINGS THAT EMILY HAS GOING FOR HER: 1. She's pretty (when she's got make-up on). 2. She ...

Pretty sweet...and a killer last line. However, there were TOO MANY EXCLAMATION POINTS! Augh! You can truly skewer a perfectly good piece of writing with exclamation points...which is why you've ...

Hey, this is pretty good! I'd have to agree with Snoink though on the grammar...and some of it is just awkward. But we'll fix that, eh? 'Nothing. There was absolutely ...

You have an absolutely GRAND storyline, dahling, but this story is seriously...ugh. Why? GRAMMAR! I shall become ze Grammar Nazi and lead you through some basic stuff to help this ...

Oh, man, a very, very good ending. However, for such an exciting story you put a little too much emphasis on description and not what's actually going on. It seems ...

Thank Dusky for leading me to this...it's the only good thing I've read this week...:D "Don’t believe it. Someone is trying to spread the rumor that life is easy." I'd ...

I love the way you introduce your characters. It's never anything normal, "The boy with the brown hair's name is Billy" or anything like that. It's purely unique, and it ...

First of all...does it go on? Or did you just end it there? Because if you did, that would be bad, and you most definitely need to add something. :P ...

It was rather a nice rant... But yeah. I thought the whole exchange between Charlie and his friends was far too low key- especially on the subject of girls. Could ...

This would be a totally awesome beginning to a story... 'A fleeting memory had crossed the netherregions of her mind' YAY!!! I absolutely love that word...I must use it... 'a ...

It's quite Lurlene McDaniel... The piece was pretty inspirational, though, as we all sort of (in our own way) strive to be like Marcus- positive and fearless. He's got the ...

This was a really good piece- it gave you quite an insight into the business world (especially since everything made so much sense. How in the world did you pull ...