Riedawriter23

Hello! :) Okay, I think that you used a lot of descritption, and good job as far as imagery is concerned, but some of your sentences are just far too ...

I like this. It's so...sarcastic and humorous and yet serious. I think that you could have added a little more of yourself in this though. The message seems like it ...

Hello and welcome to YWS! :) OKay, in the beginning, the grammar mistakes really got to me. It wasn't that it was bad the way that you said just confused ...

I also agree with what was said before. Not only do you have a lot of grammar errors and the story is far too dependent of dialogue, but the story ...

Okay, the thing with this poem is, you have a great base, but your rhyme scheme is off in a lot of stanzas and you repeat "This is the child" ...

I like this. I think that you had a good idea going for you, but this can be extended. Your rhyme scheme was very nice, so I think that if ...

I like the sound of it, it's very mysterious. The only thing is that you repeat yourself a lot, and even though it's most likely meant to sound very lyrical, ...

It can't be right For me to cry When I think of you Because you're the perfect guy. **I like the first three lines here, but the last one seems ...

I really enjoyed this. I toiled late into the night, With needle and golden thread I worked, trying to sew Your heart together again. **The first time I read this ...

Hello! Welcome to YWS! :) Okay, now with the critique. I think that this is quite cliche. Someone being alone, as you said so yourself "Of course everyone know how ...

I agree with borgishsmorg, I really liked your whole idea but I couldn't get any feeling from this because you didn't really explain why or what you can't do. Try ...

To be honest, I couldn't really get myself to finish this. It wasn't that your intentions weren't was just the way that you gave it out like that. The questions ...

This is more like dialogue then poetry. I think that this is your motive (a cliche motive at that) but that you haven't put it into poem form yet. You ...

This faucet is on the fritz. Drip, Drip, Drip, Every morning another drip. The beads of water gather at the tip, gaining weight with every sip. **I really like this ...

I agree, this did seem unfinished. I felt like there was so much more to come. Aside from that though, I really do love your voice! I felt like I ...