PsychicNinja

Hello! I'm going to crit this as I read it: I walked up to Tsunade's paper covered desk. If you wanna say it this way, I think that 'paper' and ...

Hey Alice. You tried to fix me way too fast You didn’t know it was sugar glass Sorry, I really getting tired of 'suger glass'. :( Find the superglue tonight ...

Hey Jabbs. It's very repetative. I don't really like repetative. Just an opinion. It's really long... I only read about the first five verses, because I got bored of it. ...

Hey Alice. I agree with Doctor Clicky. and Kalliope about the contradictory thing. I also really don't like how you repeat the chorus way to much. It sounds a little ...

Hey Catriona. Nice job. I really, really liked it. I can actually sorta hear this. Many days I’ve wandered, many days I’ve strayed I’m about to fall off the edge, ...

Hey Alice. First off, you say that the narrator's heart loves the darknes...then you say it needs light...and then if she/he falls leave him/her there. That's kinda contradictory in my ...

I liked your other poems, but I'm not a big fan of this one. It's a little long. And you repeat the the chorus too as a song it would ...

Hi, Jessica. Here to crit again: He had black hair and eyes and, she noticed he and the other genin wore Hidden Leaf forehead protectors. You put the comma in ...

Hey! I just finished critting Audra's story... So I'm critting as I go along: The storm let loose a torrent of freezing cold rain. Lightning flashed across the sky and ...

Konnichiwa, Audra-chan! Critting as I go (again): Itachi could not grasp the possibility of that. Neither could Ayumi. It was impossible to birth fire from water, wasn’t it? Nonetheless, it ...

Konbanwa, Audra-chan! I'm extremely happy to finally begin reading and commenting on your newly reworked story!!!!!!! So here, I'm critting as I go along!: A rifle discharged; the bullet splintered ...

Ya know, I totally missed this when I first started re-critting these posts, Audra..but I critted them anyway, so you can probably take a few hints or tips from there. ...

Konbanwa, Audra-chan! Hehe, you know how it works: “What’s the matter?” He loosened his grip on her arms, bringing one hand up to cup her cheek. “Why are you crying?” ...

Konbanwa, Audra-chan. Itachi glanced at him, smirking weakly. “And I thought ‘she stayed in the way?’” How 'bout was in the way? “That’s the last time…I will underestimate…one possesse

Konbanwa, Audra-chan. same old, same old: “We have just received a message from an ANBU squad who had been tracking the Akatsuki” – Ayumi caught her breath – “They are ...