PenguinAttack

Hullo Preten, I'm here as requested and I'm very much ready to rip this apart. First: rhyme. If you're going to rhyme, we don't want Dr Seuss rhyme, where it's ...

Hey Maggie! So. So. I see what you are doing here. I see it and I like it and I feel like I've told you that before. You lose it ...

Hahah, Sparkleponii! What even is this, why didn't I know you had posted this funny little thing! I love how you use the typical laments of the author against them. ...

Hi Kabloo! So I'm sure you're going to be sick of hearing this, but these aren't haiku! They have the form of the haiku, being 5,7,5 but they're not actually ...

Hey Sparkleponii, So I like what you're doing here. I like the back and forth and the image of subservience that you're using to keep the poem in line. I ...

Hey Hannahbobannah, You know I love your poetry and I remember this from the on the Spot poem thread. I think it isn't as strong as your last poem at ...

Hi Los! I haven't seen you around in forever so I hope you get this anyway! Your poem is missing basically all formatting. I don't know if that's an error ...

Hi Ela! I like what you have here, it's interesting and it's emotional, the right kind of emotional. I think that if you are looking for a way to finish ...

Hey Niagini! So firstly, I like this. I like what you're saying and how you're saying it, I'm often impressed and liking your poetry, so that's always a good start. ...

Hi! So I'm here for these two chapters like I promised. These are even shorter than the last one! You run through the action super fast and we're left wondering ...

Hi musicgirl! You've got some great commentary on this, but I wanted to review your first chapter before I moved on to the new ones you posted! Everyone has mentioned ...

=Hey there loller, As Kyll says, this is super short. I don't mind that it's short because it's to the point and this is really a kind of one shot ...

Hey dogs, Here for more noms! Ahahaha, you should have killed him! The colonel shouts twice in the one paragraph and that’s mad distracting. Make the first a non-shout, the ...

Hey Lette, So this is about 50 times better, haha! You've cleaned it up and tightened it and the good editing shows. I still really like the sneaky snake and ...

Hi davantageous! This is super long and that is so cool. I’m not going to comment on every part of this poem. What I’m going to do is use some ...